Remember the promise you made

So I finally got written up today. I was wondering what it would take. Apparently, missing class, and not calling Gina about it. I don't really care, to be honest. I'm hoping to be at that job for maybe another month or two. We'll see how that works. I was riding with Joe down to the training class; he got caught up in Kyle helping his father, and was late getting back to town. I wasn't going to drive down by myself when he was going down as well, so I waited for him. NOTE: That last statement IS NOT an attempt to shuffle responsibility for my missing class on to Joe. I made the decision to wait around in town for him, it's MY FAULT that I wasn't in class, and I'm NOT trying to say anything otherwise. People ask why I didn't go, that's why. Important distinction, compared to saying it's Joe's fault I missed class. But yeah, Gina called my cell phone... well, she had Ashley call, told her to tell me that I'd better be there in fifteen minutes, that it wasn't an option.

I kind of have a problem when she phrases things that way. What if I had been in Austin? Somewhere without transportation?

That's just me being a smartass, though.

Moving on.

I went in, she told me that I'd disappointed her, betrayed her trust, and earned myself a writeup, and a stern one at that. She also asked me if there was anything bothering me outside of work, if everything was okay at home. I told her everything was fine - she's not someone I'm going to turn to with my problems. That, and I'm not really having any. Well, not outside of work, at least. I mean, yeah, I've realized I really HATE my job, that I don't want to be in food service/customer service (The first part is more important to not be in than the second), that going back to school and getting my degree is a huge priority for me, and I'm afraid that I've screwed things up enough that I won't be able to do it.

I'm not going to talk to her about that, though. At least not 'til I turn in my two weeks notice. I HATE working for a company based in San Antonio that makes no recognition or allowance for the fact that one of its major stores is based in San Marcos, and has another one in Seguin. The training classes, for example. We're paid for the time in class, sure, but not for travel, nor do we receive any compensation for the drive there and back. Now, for a high paying job, I can understand forced commuting, but it's really not worth eight fifty an hour. I mean, I applied to work in San Marcos. If I wanted to work in Seguin, or San Antonio, I would have gone to those cities and placed applications. I HATE DRIVING LONG DISTANCES. Anything above twenty minutes is just too long for me. Sunday night drives to Seguin or San Antonio are really starting to get on my nerves, although we at least receive gas money if we do the long one. And yes, I drove to Austin all the time to play DDR. That, however, is a little different. Shorter, first of all. It was MY CHOICE, on MY TERMS. If I decided that I didn't want to go, I could make that change in my itinerary. Going to North Carolina twice is another counter-example, and looking back, it's hard for me to believe I actually did that. Whatever.

And maybe it wouldn't be so bad if the classes weren't such a gigantic waste of time. But they are. I'm not saying training classes in general are a waste of time; quit the contrary. An efficient, effective training program, well thought-out and implemented to the benefit of the company would be, well, spectacular. Increase worker productivity, make sure everyone knows all job-critical information, let the employee's get to know each other and learn together... a ton of great stuff for everyone, with definite returns on the investment necessary.

But we don't have that. We have this kind of half-assed amalgram of, well, a bunch of crap. I mean, most of the classes could be subtitled "Jenn reads you the packet" or "Jenn reads you the Powerpoint Presentation" or, best-case, "Jenn reads you the PowerPoint Presentation, which is just an outline of the packet". Don't even get me started on the ones by Mr. John C Maxwell. So yeah, it's really frustrating to have to drive forty-five minutes, not get paid for the drive, sit through an incredible boring, worthless class, then have to drive back. Yeah, not so fun.

So, in closing, I couldn't less about getting written up. I mean, I'm not going to purposely provoke additional ones or anything. I'm not going to stop doing my job, or intentionally sabotage stuff, nothing like that. That's dirty and dishonest. I'll do my job to the best of my abilities as long as I have it.

But anyway.

Yeah, been feeling pretty blah lately, probably the last couple weeks. Dunno why. Probably just a bunch of little things getting to me. Something cyclical, maybe. We'll see.

Kate Ryan -- The Promise You Made