Will you be there, holding my hand?

So the week's finally over. It was kind of a crazy one - I was originally scheduled to close Monday - Thursday, 5 - 12 on Friday, and off Saturday and Sunday, 39 hours. I ended up with 52. Jason, the new MIT that we're training for Seguin or Bulverde or something, he ended up calling in on his third day. Supposedly, his mother is having issues, but we're not sure. I mean, we're giving him the benefit of doubt, but at this point, the burden of proof is squarely on his shoulders. Clelia had to leave as well, and we lost Tex since he didn't go and take his drug test within 24 hours of his accident. So we still have Ashley, Emily, Greg, and Enrique. Gina's said we have another two drivers coming on board, and she wants to hire another two CSRs. I think. They're kind of fun to have around, I guess - it's weird having someone inside that isn't a manager, but it helps keep labor down and what-not. Without both of them there on Thursday, I would have been royally screwed. It was tough as it was, but we handled things okay. Friday and Saturday got really busy with the weather and all, but on Saturday, it didn't happen until like seven or so, they had *almost* sent me home when it hit. I still ended up getting out of there at a decent time. We ended up slightly over 21k for the week, not too shabby. If this weather continues, though, we could have another really good week.

Except...

Becca and Felicia both put in their two weeks' notice at Seguin, which leaves *one* MIT - and it's Amber, who isn't that great anyway. Eileen will be coming back from vacation right into the middle of all this, which will be fun for her. She'll probably turn to Gina for help; my guess is that Ambra will end up running Seguin. I'm certainly not going to do it - they've tried to give me Seguin once, and I don't think anyone else at our store wants to, which leaves her. So yeah. Oh, she came and handed down some *more* inane policies - first and foremost, no radio. Period. Once again, some retard down in San Antonio did something stupid, and it's affecting our store, which is really frustrating. We've never had an issue with the radio; it's secured down to its current location, and it's almost never on except for after close, which takes us longer than other stores, since we're busy right up 'til close, *and* we close an hour later than just about everyone else (and I heard they might be making us open an hour earlier too, which is also retarded). Let's see, what else? Oh, yeah, they want us to record driver license numbers on credit card reciepts - also not gonna happen. There were a few more gems, but I've had enough of dealing with corporate bullcrap for now.

On to funner stuff, like girls that refuse to give straight answers, which is one of the most frustrating aspects of dealing with them. As weird as it sounds, that's one of the things I liked best about the relationship I had with Mindy (who will be turning 20 soon, if not already; I don't quite remember when her birthday is). We were very open, very honest with each other. I mean, yeah, she dumped me once or twice for another guy, but I never had to worry about her not telling me that. She'd be very honest about it - "Billy, I'm dumping you for another guy." We could very easily discuss what we liked, what we didn't; it's kind of hard to enunciate. So I sent this girl I like a message telling her as much. Before you start saying anything about the medium used, yeah, it should have been done in person. I prefer to do things in person. I did it that way for several reasons. First and foremost, our schedules were the exact opposite - she was opening, I was closing, so there weren't a lot of great oppurtunities. Second, once I decide to do something, I tend to do it at the first available chance. Third, there are a few benefits to doing it over a written medium - you get to carefully construct your message, you don't really put the recipient on the spot, and they are under less pressure to respond. I no longer have the copy of what I sent her, but there were a few key points; predominantly, if her answer was 'no' (not that I was asking her anything), to just say so, as I understood there were a lot of reasons for that. Her reponse? I'm not going to post everything, just a few key excerpts.

Instead of starting out with the tired ol' "I'm flattered but..." line (which basically is like the kiss of death, but this is NOT that) I'm going to say this. My feelings for you, other than of the friendship variety are still very high up in the air.

I just need more time to think this through more.

and not to sound harsh..this is not another thing that I want to just ahve to "get through". I want to put some thought into it, some thought that would actually give me a better perspective.

When I read her response, I read it to say that she wasn't sure. It wasn't a no, but it was far from any sort of yes either. Not sure now type thing. I still stand by that interpretation.

However, we got into a discussion Saturday night that began on a joking note, but at some point, transitioned into a discussion of our relationship, during which she expressed confusion, believing herself to have already said that we were to be just friends. I asked her when such a conversation had taken place, and she referenced the conversation I've quoted from above.

Now, it's not the rejection that I mind. Well, a little - nobody likes rejection. But that's not what frightens me with girls, what makes me hesitate and second-guess myself. It's the ambiguity, the non-straight-fowardness. It's something I faced with Lilie consistently, and it's one of my top pet peeves; in relationship-type areas, it INFURIATES me. I mean, yeah, you can be ambigiuos without meaning to, because you thought what you said was fairly clear. Then there's being ambigiuos because you don't know how you feel, which is perfectly fine.

Gah, I'm not sure what I'm trying to say, and this thing is getting a little long, and I should go ahead and just post it (It's Wednesday morning, 5:55 am, at this point.)

3 Doors Down -- Kryptonite