Few things to catch up on - the SFFS party, the party (and lack thereof) last night, Shelley's Friday night, etc.
So I'll start with boring stuff first, to get it out of the way. I finally processed the 500+ DDR mp3s I got through DDRAmerica. That was a major pain in the ass. I had to go through and edit each one's ID3v2 tags, because they had all kinds of weird capitalizations going on, and I had to retype the name and artist fields on each one. The album field was fine, though. That took something like three to five hours. But that's finally over with, and I've got all of them on my playlist now (which has been updated, now up to almost 2200).
I've got some pictures to upload; I'll see if I can get to that today before I have to go to work. Probably not, though - I have to clean my room and mow the lawn. Fun times.
So, the SFFS Party:
I found out about it Monday while playing DDR; I asked Derrick if he or anyone else was going to Dragon's Lair for open gaming on Thursday; he said no, because he was DJ'ing at the SFFS Halloween party, and most of the SFFS people would be there. I asked the guys about it while playing D&D that night (well, sort of; I didn't stay long; I'll come back to that). Michael said he'd go if he wasn't doing anything else, and to call him and ask. So I did, and he wasn't, so we went. Lilie was working 4 - C, or I would have invited her as well. I got my fairy costume together - the wings, bought a new tiara, the old magic wand, and some glitter. I tried to find a girl to put it on - to make sure nothing went wrong - but was having trouble. I forgot momentarily that Lilie was at work and called her (This becomes important a few chapters down the road), but just couldn't find anyone. I ended up talking to Lauren Wyatt, who I really haven't seen since high school (though we did run each other at Spider-Man, but spoke only briefly). She cut her hair fairly short, and she wasn't wearing a necklace. Other than that, she seems basically like I remember. Anyway, she put the glitter on my face; I also learned how to do it on my own, should the need arise later (and it did). She also lent Michael some horns on a leather band, so he had a costume as well - a white devil, or something like that. Preparations complete, we headed to the LBJ Student Center.
There was a guy dressed as Robin Hood standing outside the door, greeting people. I would later learn he was the SFFS's faculty advisor. Michael and I went in and paid our entrance fees; Brett was sitting in one of the chairs at the table. That was weird. I guess I knew in the back of my subconscious that he was in the SFFS, but it didn't really occur to me that he'd be there - he didn't say anything Monday night, and an officer at that!
The setup was fairly standard - there was a table on the back wall with some food and drinks, as well as two little globe things with dry ice and water to provide some odd smoke; a handful of round tables scattered throughout the room; there was a projection TV set up on one wall with Halo and two linked X-Boxes; Derrick had brought in his computer to play music, though the speaker setup sucked - it was just his personal speakers. They provided decent music, but the whole effect was... kind of laughable. Not that many people showed up - I'd guess less than twenty. At least half the people there were involved in setting it up, which is cool, but not a good ratio.
I played a lot of Halo, though I don't think we ever even got a full eight players. I stayed on the projection TV and held my own for once. We played mainly 2 on 3 or 3 on 3 teams. A few people rotated in and out, but there was core group of four or so people - I also met Rem, who does Halo LAN things, and I may be going to some of those. Which would be cool.
Caleb was there. That was another occurrence I should have anticipated, but didn't because I wasn't thinking. He wanted to talk about why I had stopped talking to him, while I really didn't. I really just didn't want to talk to him at all. I'm not mad at him or anything, I just don't want to be friends with him or hang out or anything.
Oh, and I got hit on, for the first time in my life. Of course, it was by a gay guy. Which puts a humorous slant on the whole thing. I'm flattered, don't get me wrong. It's just funny. It started during the officer auction, which was just sad. No one bid on anyone. Not really. Michael won Brett for like 20 bucks. Anyway, I was sitting at one table with Michael, and this guy was sitting at this other table with a much larger group. We kept making eye contact, and he raised his eyebrows at me once or twice. Michael noticed this and commented on it. Later, when we were just standing around talking, he totally just came up and started joining in on our conversation. Or tried to, at least - none of us really responded to him at all. Later, after Lilie called (more on this later), Michael, Brett and I were standing around talking. I was relating what had just transpired between us to them, and again he came up and stood with us. I kept referring to 'her' in an obviously more-than-friends manner (well, sorta - "She just wants to be friends", "She called and we talked", etc). So I think he realized I'm not gay. But then Brett asked me what Caleb wanted - I guess he noticed that Caleb kept coming up to me and trying to talk to me - and I said, "Well, he wanted to talk about why we broke up." (which is what I refer to it as). Later, Michael commented on that - "Do you realize what you just said?" (Talking about breaking up with another guy in front of the gay guy who'd been hitting on me). That alone was worth the price of admission.
There were some cool costumes. Well, I guess. There were two Indiana Jones, neither of which was James East (who was also there) or Josh (who usually does that). There was a wizard, who looked really cool. Lily (Derrick's girlfriend) was a cat. There were two other girls dressed as cats as well, though I didn't know any of them. Brett was dressed as some 70's guy - big fro, white shite, gold chain with a peace sign. He wouldn't disco, but Michael may force him to since he bought him in the auction. Liz, this girl, had on a huge burgundy dress and a sort of peacock mask - it was really pretty, and had a lot of glitter on her exposed shoulders and upper torso. We even had a weird discussion about the differences in our glitter - mine was much more outspoken; hers, more subtle. When we first started talking, she asked me if she knew me from somewhere, but I didn't remember seeing her before. She later changed into a much smaller black dress, and I didn't even recognize her - I'm just not good with faces until I spend some more time around someone. But she seemed pretty cool. CJ was some anime character and won the Male division of the costume contest, which annoyed me. Seriously. He's kind of annoying overall. The overall winners were these two chicks dressed as vampires. Not cool vampires, but angst-filled, noble-type vampires like something out of Vampire: The Masquerade or something. The one who spoke couldn't think very fast on her feet, either - she tried to deliver an impromptu monologue, but it didn't work at all. I wanted to smack her. Hard.
I did win a door prize, though. As did Michael. We could take one thing off of one table, or five comics. I took this little grey stuffed spider with six legs. Which makes it not a spider, I s'pose. The other choices were a bar of soap with a Princess Amidala action figure in the middle, or something else. That, and I don't like comic books. That's what Michael took. They ended up giving away all of the comic books at the end anyway.
Lilie called me at one point. That's significant, 'cause she NEVER calls people. Well, she calls people back, but that's about it. And she was just returning my call from earlier. But we had it out. We talked about our relationship, and our physicalility - as she put it, her 'line' is in a different place from other people's. So we're just friends. Which is cool. Because we're very close friends - I trust her immensely, and do feel very close to her. We're fairly close physically as well, which is what was was causing me all the confusion in the first place, even though she had said that we were just friends. It's just one of these things that's ingrained deep in my psyche. I'm working on not falling in love with her just 'cause we hug a lot and what-not, and she shows such definite caring, and is so sweet, and... well, you get the point. I do like her. A lot. But I can live with 'just friends'.
Mom's freaking out about me not having the yard mowed yet, so I'm going to have to do the rest later.
2004-10-31
2004-10-29
Okuyatos: Kind Lady
Lyrics courtesy of Anime Lyrics
A fool for love
He knew that his heart was healing
He'd been hurt too much to try again
But when she caught his eye
Ain't no man could fight the feeling
He knew he had to try to let love in
Smiled to let him know
She was in the mood for talking
So then he began to play the game
Before he knew it
He had told her how much he'd been hurting
How he was hoping she was not the same
Could you be
The kind of lady that I'm seeking?
After all of this time
Could this be true love?
And she said, Boy you don't have to look no more
I'll give the love you need 'til you holler enough, guaranteed
Not like the rest, boy, I'm a kind lady
You've been hurt but be sure boy I am the cure
And when you wake up late thinking it's a dream
Just touch me boy you know, you can count on me
Believe me
Baby
This lady
You know what you've found in me
Is a lady
Kind o'lady
That can give you what you need
Baby
A kind lady
That will never leave you lonely and
Just maybe
This lady
Finally you've found me, oh
Kind lady
A fool for love
He knew that his heart was healing
He'd been hurt too much to try again
But when she caught his eye
Ain't no man could fight the feeling
He knew he had to try to let love in
Smiled to let him know
She was in the mood for talking
So then he began to play the game
Before he knew it
He had told her how much he'd been hurting
How he was hoping she was not the same
Could you be
The kind of lady that I'm seeking?
After all of this time
Could this be true love?
And she said, Boy you don't have to look no more
I'll give the love you need 'til you holler enough, guaranteed
Not like the rest, boy, I'm a kind lady
You've been hurt but be sure boy I am the cure
And when you wake up late thinking it's a dream
Just touch me boy you know, you can count on me
Believe me
Baby
This lady
You know what you've found in me
Is a lady
Kind o'lady
That can give you what you need
Baby
A kind lady
That will never leave you lonely and
Just maybe
This lady
Finally you've found me, oh
Kind lady
We're so worried about saving our souls, afraid that God will take his toll, we forget to begin - Jewel
As it turns out, I do have a life outside of Lilie. Shocking, I know. Let's see what I've been up to in other areas:
Works been going okay. I'm usually opening Tue/Thu/Sun, and a day shift on Saturday. I've got the opening thing down fairly well; no other alarm incidents - though Dave hasn't given me my own code yet, so I'm still using Javi's. He's finally agreed to give me my assistant manager raise, though I have a feeling it's going to be very small. Once I've proven my skills, I'll ask him about it. It's really weird for me to be working such a set schedule. Last semester and all summer, I was working a mixed schedule, since my online courses didn't bound my time at all. Now, that, since I can't work Mon/Wed/Fri day, and he's been giving me nights off when I have school that day (and now, on days when I open the next day), my schedule is fairly fixed. I haven't really worked with anyone from night crew in a while. I used to have fairly good connections to everyone else, from having worked with them, but no anymore. I haven't worked with Freddie or Katie in a long time, for example. I'll see Freddie tonight (I think) when I go in at close to review the closing procedures with Javi, and I've been talking to Katie intermittently online. There's really not a terribly lot more I can say about work, other than I loathe it incredibly.
Well, there's a few more things I can say. I'll be working 5 - C Halloween night, so there go any plans for me. We're encouraged to wear costumes, and of course, I only have one costume that I've worn in the past three or four years, so I'll probably wear that. They tend to get in the way, though, so I don't know how long I'll be wearing them for. We'll just see.
Classes have been going okay. We recently had an Intro to Fine Arts test, which I think I did okay on. He usually takes a while to grade, so it'll probably take a week or so to get the grade back. I didn't go to Chemistry class all week, but I did get a 15/15 on the homework that was due Tuesday night, so I'm fairly certain I have a decent grasp on the current concepts being discussed. I have to write an annoying program dealing with classes for CS class. Probability is, well, probability - the same as when I took it in high school, except that we're going into the proofs on equations that we just took as axioms earlier. Which is pretty cool. Chem lab is going better than I thought it would be. Mahin, our TA, is using express grading, and I've been getting 20's (out of 20) on all of the labs recently, as well on our most recent quiz, which I half pulled out of my ass. Apparently, there's some cool stuff up in there, need to check on that. I got asked for help twice in the past two weeks, which is good, because I managed to meet a f ew people.
After lab today, I went to play DDR at the Student Center for about an hour, hour and a half. There were these two guys playing as well; we alternated. They were... well, crappy. But they were beginners, so I'm not trying to sound really arrogant or anything. One played on Beginner, the other mainly on light, with the occasional Standard. I have trouble accurately gauging other people's skill levels, because I immediately caught the difference between jumps and 8th notes while playing, due to my musical background. I had to drive up to work afterwards to see who was closing tonight - Javi - to make sure I could come in and review the closing procedures. I went through the Sessoms & University(/Aquarena) intersection, and heard a car horn honk. I turned back, and sure enough, Lilie was at the light. She was on her way to work. I called her to say 'hey', but it turned out she hadn't honked. Which is really just weird. Very weird.
On the way home, I (finally) found "NexLevel", the new cyber-cafe on the square. It seems pretty cool (pictures to follow). They have like 14 computers, two tvs, and a PS2 hooked up to a nice TV. The rate for PS2 or Xbox is something like $5 an hour, or 4 for members. They also have two metal DDR pads; I paid $2.50 for half an hour of play. I didn't have any real problems on the pad, though it took a bit to adjust to the different feel. I even tried playing some doubles, but that didn't work. Pity. I played for almost an hour when I realized how long I'd been playing. Went over to the register to get something to drink, and admonished them for not letting me know my time was up. They said, and I quit, "Psh!" Or something like that. There wasn't really anyone else in there anyway. I took a number of pictures (to be posted later).
In fact, I'm going to have to cut this one short - Shelley and I had an interesting conversation:
Works been going okay. I'm usually opening Tue/Thu/Sun, and a day shift on Saturday. I've got the opening thing down fairly well; no other alarm incidents - though Dave hasn't given me my own code yet, so I'm still using Javi's. He's finally agreed to give me my assistant manager raise, though I have a feeling it's going to be very small. Once I've proven my skills, I'll ask him about it. It's really weird for me to be working such a set schedule. Last semester and all summer, I was working a mixed schedule, since my online courses didn't bound my time at all. Now, that, since I can't work Mon/Wed/Fri day, and he's been giving me nights off when I have school that day (and now, on days when I open the next day), my schedule is fairly fixed. I haven't really worked with anyone from night crew in a while. I used to have fairly good connections to everyone else, from having worked with them, but no anymore. I haven't worked with Freddie or Katie in a long time, for example. I'll see Freddie tonight (I think) when I go in at close to review the closing procedures with Javi, and I've been talking to Katie intermittently online. There's really not a terribly lot more I can say about work, other than I loathe it incredibly.
Well, there's a few more things I can say. I'll be working 5 - C Halloween night, so there go any plans for me. We're encouraged to wear costumes, and of course, I only have one costume that I've worn in the past three or four years, so I'll probably wear that. They tend to get in the way, though, so I don't know how long I'll be wearing them for. We'll just see.
Classes have been going okay. We recently had an Intro to Fine Arts test, which I think I did okay on. He usually takes a while to grade, so it'll probably take a week or so to get the grade back. I didn't go to Chemistry class all week, but I did get a 15/15 on the homework that was due Tuesday night, so I'm fairly certain I have a decent grasp on the current concepts being discussed. I have to write an annoying program dealing with classes for CS class. Probability is, well, probability - the same as when I took it in high school, except that we're going into the proofs on equations that we just took as axioms earlier. Which is pretty cool. Chem lab is going better than I thought it would be. Mahin, our TA, is using express grading, and I've been getting 20's (out of 20) on all of the labs recently, as well on our most recent quiz, which I half pulled out of my ass. Apparently, there's some cool stuff up in there, need to check on that. I got asked for help twice in the past two weeks, which is good, because I managed to meet a f ew people.
After lab today, I went to play DDR at the Student Center for about an hour, hour and a half. There were these two guys playing as well; we alternated. They were... well, crappy. But they were beginners, so I'm not trying to sound really arrogant or anything. One played on Beginner, the other mainly on light, with the occasional Standard. I have trouble accurately gauging other people's skill levels, because I immediately caught the difference between jumps and 8th notes while playing, due to my musical background. I had to drive up to work afterwards to see who was closing tonight - Javi - to make sure I could come in and review the closing procedures. I went through the Sessoms & University(/Aquarena) intersection, and heard a car horn honk. I turned back, and sure enough, Lilie was at the light. She was on her way to work. I called her to say 'hey', but it turned out she hadn't honked. Which is really just weird. Very weird.
On the way home, I (finally) found "NexLevel", the new cyber-cafe on the square. It seems pretty cool (pictures to follow). They have like 14 computers, two tvs, and a PS2 hooked up to a nice TV. The rate for PS2 or Xbox is something like $5 an hour, or 4 for members. They also have two metal DDR pads; I paid $2.50 for half an hour of play. I didn't have any real problems on the pad, though it took a bit to adjust to the different feel. I even tried playing some doubles, but that didn't work. Pity. I played for almost an hour when I realized how long I'd been playing. Went over to the register to get something to drink, and admonished them for not letting me know my time was up. They said, and I quit, "Psh!" Or something like that. There wasn't really anyone else in there anyway. I took a number of pictures (to be posted later).
In fact, I'm going to have to cut this one short - Shelley and I had an interesting conversation:
|
What took you so long, what took you all night? - Emma Bunton
It's time to end this, once and for all.
I'm not sleeping until I've full caught up on everything.
This may be a fairly long post. Additionally, there will be stream-of-consciousness moments, where I just sort of ramble.
You have been warned.
Okay, first and foremost, the whole "Lilie thing".
First, for those of you who aren't terribly good at predicting patterns or detecting literary foreshadowing, we're just friends. Close, affectionate, friends. (Well, we'll see how things go the next time we're together, but I think they're going to go just fine. I hope.)
Now that you've read the last page, let's go back to the middle of the book.
So on these four evenings, Shayna (?) had left, leaving Shelley by herself in their apartment. She called both Lilie and I to come hang out and watch some movies. So we did. The first night, we watched Van Helsing; the second, Day After Tomorrow and.... argh. For some reason, I can't quite recall the other movie we watched that night; the third, 13 Going on 30 and Mean Girls; the fourth, The Prince and Me and The Punisher. That's when things started to get weird. We started getting... really physical. Not sexual, or making out, but just about everything else. There was a *lot* of tickling. From both of them. Lilie also... bit me. Not in a sucking-vampiric-hicky kind of way (Suzie), but in an 'Ow! That's my knee!' kind of way. She bit me twice in one evening, once on the back (OW!) and once on the knee (OW!!). That night, when I was hugging her good night, she bit me in the tender area between the shoulder and neck. Without a shirt in the way. For a while. I didn't really squirm or shout or anything. I just enjoyed it. Because it was nice.
I also finally got to feel her, um, you know. No, not that! The other one. Yes, those. Once, when she was lying on the floor, and I was in front of her, I kind of leaned back to rest on her. I realized where I was and started to pull back and apologize, but she said it was okay. The other time, I was lying on the couch, and she sat on me, hip to hip. Her head was kind of on my head, and... yeah, they were kind of right in my face. Or something like that.
Shelley spilt her whole life story. I really had no idea. I'm not quite sure how to react or respond. Pity is definitely out; I think I'm going to end up with respect. To have to have gone through so much, for so long... I really can't even begin to imagine it. It makes me look back at the things I've been through, how difficult I thought they were, and laugh. it does help provide the context that you really have to use, though.
That's when the problem started. Not when Shelley started spilling her whole life story, I mean, but when Lilie and I started being really physical with each other. (I'm incorporating information I later learned as well). We're both very physical, affectionate people. Her "line", as she puts it, is in a different place from most people. I, on the other hand, don't know if I have a "line" or where it is. The problem was/is that I've never been in a friendship that was very physical. So, being in one was kind of weird for me, and I had trouble remembering 'just friends', and got really confused. That led to our most recent conversation, but we'll come to that later. I've kind of jumped out of seqeuence here.
I even kissed her good night once. It's weird - when we hug good night, we hug for a *long* time. A *long* time. Then, when we finish and go to un-embrace, our heads pull back, but we're still holding each other close. We tend to talk some, very quietly, with ouer heads very close together. It's really weird, because our lips are close together as well. So I did kiss her the other night. On the lips. Nothing open-mouthed or long or anything. Incidentally, when I asked her about that, saying I shouldn't have, she said something to the effect of she didn't not enjoy it; if she was offended or thought I was being too foward or anything, she would have said something.
Odd.
So I'm kind of jumping around here. The main point(s) - we had a blast hanging out at Shelley's, and explored the physical nature of our relationship (friendship). But I kind of forgot about us being "Just friends", and got confused. So I called her and asked her about it. Yes, I am an idiot. We sort of talked after the last night at Shelley's, which was incredibly awkward for all concerend. Didn't really accomplish anything, though, since she had a headache and was really tired. So her and Shelley talked yesterday (it's Friday morning now), and she almost had an anxiety attack and was in tears (as Shelley says). That *really* hurts me. The last thing I would ever want is to make her cry or freak out or get hurt in any way. She called me while I was at the SFFS costume ball (more on that later), and we talked some more. We also talked as I drove home, and some more while I was lying in bed. Basically, we talked (again) about being just friends, established that we're both physically affectionate people, and that I'm an idiot and that all the confusion was my fault (well, she didn't really agree to that last part).
I'm not sleeping until I've full caught up on everything.
This may be a fairly long post. Additionally, there will be stream-of-consciousness moments, where I just sort of ramble.
You have been warned.
Okay, first and foremost, the whole "Lilie thing".
First, for those of you who aren't terribly good at predicting patterns or detecting literary foreshadowing, we're just friends. Close, affectionate, friends. (Well, we'll see how things go the next time we're together, but I think they're going to go just fine. I hope.)
Now that you've read the last page, let's go back to the middle of the book.
So on these four evenings, Shayna (?) had left, leaving Shelley by herself in their apartment. She called both Lilie and I to come hang out and watch some movies. So we did. The first night, we watched Van Helsing; the second, Day After Tomorrow and.... argh. For some reason, I can't quite recall the other movie we watched that night; the third, 13 Going on 30 and Mean Girls; the fourth, The Prince and Me and The Punisher. That's when things started to get weird. We started getting... really physical. Not sexual, or making out, but just about everything else. There was a *lot* of tickling. From both of them. Lilie also... bit me. Not in a sucking-vampiric-hicky kind of way (Suzie), but in an 'Ow! That's my knee!' kind of way. She bit me twice in one evening, once on the back (OW!) and once on the knee (OW!!). That night, when I was hugging her good night, she bit me in the tender area between the shoulder and neck. Without a shirt in the way. For a while. I didn't really squirm or shout or anything. I just enjoyed it. Because it was nice.
I also finally got to feel her, um, you know. No, not that! The other one. Yes, those. Once, when she was lying on the floor, and I was in front of her, I kind of leaned back to rest on her. I realized where I was and started to pull back and apologize, but she said it was okay. The other time, I was lying on the couch, and she sat on me, hip to hip. Her head was kind of on my head, and... yeah, they were kind of right in my face. Or something like that.
Shelley spilt her whole life story. I really had no idea. I'm not quite sure how to react or respond. Pity is definitely out; I think I'm going to end up with respect. To have to have gone through so much, for so long... I really can't even begin to imagine it. It makes me look back at the things I've been through, how difficult I thought they were, and laugh. it does help provide the context that you really have to use, though.
That's when the problem started. Not when Shelley started spilling her whole life story, I mean, but when Lilie and I started being really physical with each other. (I'm incorporating information I later learned as well). We're both very physical, affectionate people. Her "line", as she puts it, is in a different place from most people. I, on the other hand, don't know if I have a "line" or where it is. The problem was/is that I've never been in a friendship that was very physical. So, being in one was kind of weird for me, and I had trouble remembering 'just friends', and got really confused. That led to our most recent conversation, but we'll come to that later. I've kind of jumped out of seqeuence here.
I even kissed her good night once. It's weird - when we hug good night, we hug for a *long* time. A *long* time. Then, when we finish and go to un-embrace, our heads pull back, but we're still holding each other close. We tend to talk some, very quietly, with ouer heads very close together. It's really weird, because our lips are close together as well. So I did kiss her the other night. On the lips. Nothing open-mouthed or long or anything. Incidentally, when I asked her about that, saying I shouldn't have, she said something to the effect of she didn't not enjoy it; if she was offended or thought I was being too foward or anything, she would have said something.
Odd.
So I'm kind of jumping around here. The main point(s) - we had a blast hanging out at Shelley's, and explored the physical nature of our relationship (friendship). But I kind of forgot about us being "Just friends", and got confused. So I called her and asked her about it. Yes, I am an idiot. We sort of talked after the last night at Shelley's, which was incredibly awkward for all concerend. Didn't really accomplish anything, though, since she had a headache and was really tired. So her and Shelley talked yesterday (it's Friday morning now), and she almost had an anxiety attack and was in tears (as Shelley says). That *really* hurts me. The last thing I would ever want is to make her cry or freak out or get hurt in any way. She called me while I was at the SFFS costume ball (more on that later), and we talked some more. We also talked as I drove home, and some more while I was lying in bed. Basically, we talked (again) about being just friends, established that we're both physically affectionate people, and that I'm an idiot and that all the confusion was my fault (well, she didn't really agree to that last part).
2004-10-28
She loves a dog; he loves cats; they are friends - Erika
It's all my fault.
I should have listened to what she said, because she was right.
If I had, I wouldn't have put us both through this.
I should have listened to what she said, because she was right.
If I had, I wouldn't have put us both through this.
I turn to you, like a flower leaning towards the sun - Mel C
Alright, I really, really want to finish this. It's starting to get annoying. I've got about twenty minutes until I need to start getting ready for work.
So we had fun at Joe's Crab Shack. I was really quiet for most of the time, since I was a little out of my element. They tickled me in the parking lot, and I accidentally hit Shelley with my shoe. Other than that, good times for all. At one point, I was walking with my arm around Lilie and hers around me, and Shelley said "See, you two do make a good couple."
Wednesday, she called me about 11:30 or so while I was in Intro to Fine Arts class. Turns out her battery had died (her brake light switch had broken, so her brake lights stayed on at all times); she needed me to come jump her car so she could take it in. I told her I'd be happy to, it was just that I wouldn't get out of class until 3:15 or so, but I'd head over as soon as I could.
So I start heading to the bus to get to my truck after Probability. I almost left that class early, but we were doing this awesome proof about the Mean and Variance of a Poisson distribution. It started to rain as I was walking to my truck, and it quickly grew into a torrential downpour. Lilie called as I was driving across town to see if the rain altered our plans any; it didn't - I love the rain, personally. However, there were also some lightning strikes, one of whcih shorted out the railroad crossing by the stadium, causing a major traffic jam. It took me way too long to get past that obstacle. As it turns out, the second crossing, on Post Road, was also shorted out, but that one didn't cause near the dealy that the other one did. So I finished driving out to Lilie's - she lives out on Thousand Oaks, though right near the beginning, so I didn't drive past Chelsea's house or anything. That wsould have been *weird*.
Got her car jumped okay, then we went into town, to "Rudy's", which is her mechanic. They couldn't look at it until the next day, so I gave her a ride back to her place - by way of both Katy Station and Sonic. Headed home after that.
Thursday night, she stopped by Dragon's Lair again. I think. I'm getting a little confused on which day is which.
The other main thing that happened was that we both went to Shelley's to watch movies twice, back-to-back on both occasions (that's four days, for those of you that got confused by that statement).
Argh! I'll finish the rest up later. I have to go open - I'm going to get there a little early and make sure I have everything under control.
So we had fun at Joe's Crab Shack. I was really quiet for most of the time, since I was a little out of my element. They tickled me in the parking lot, and I accidentally hit Shelley with my shoe. Other than that, good times for all. At one point, I was walking with my arm around Lilie and hers around me, and Shelley said "See, you two do make a good couple."
Wednesday, she called me about 11:30 or so while I was in Intro to Fine Arts class. Turns out her battery had died (her brake light switch had broken, so her brake lights stayed on at all times); she needed me to come jump her car so she could take it in. I told her I'd be happy to, it was just that I wouldn't get out of class until 3:15 or so, but I'd head over as soon as I could.
So I start heading to the bus to get to my truck after Probability. I almost left that class early, but we were doing this awesome proof about the Mean and Variance of a Poisson distribution. It started to rain as I was walking to my truck, and it quickly grew into a torrential downpour. Lilie called as I was driving across town to see if the rain altered our plans any; it didn't - I love the rain, personally. However, there were also some lightning strikes, one of whcih shorted out the railroad crossing by the stadium, causing a major traffic jam. It took me way too long to get past that obstacle. As it turns out, the second crossing, on Post Road, was also shorted out, but that one didn't cause near the dealy that the other one did. So I finished driving out to Lilie's - she lives out on Thousand Oaks, though right near the beginning, so I didn't drive past Chelsea's house or anything. That wsould have been *weird*.
Got her car jumped okay, then we went into town, to "Rudy's", which is her mechanic. They couldn't look at it until the next day, so I gave her a ride back to her place - by way of both Katy Station and Sonic. Headed home after that.
Thursday night, she stopped by Dragon's Lair again. I think. I'm getting a little confused on which day is which.
The other main thing that happened was that we both went to Shelley's to watch movies twice, back-to-back on both occasions (that's four days, for those of you that got confused by that statement).
Argh! I'll finish the rest up later. I have to go open - I'm going to get there a little early and make sure I have everything under control.
2004-10-25
Follow your heart; your intuition; It will lead you in the right direction - Jewel
I think I'm going to start labeling the artists on my post titles, where applicable.
Back to catching up on the Lilie saga (soon to be released in hardcover):
I finally get out of work slightly ahead of Shelley, and call Lilie and tell her I told Shelley to come along. She seemed okay with this, so we talked about going to the movie. I knew it started at "7 something", so we decided on 7:30 (it made sense at the time. I think). I got there a little early, being lonely and having no life (well, that's changing now - it's like Monday, October 25th as I finally get around to writing this. I think I'm a week or two behind. But that's because of my recent sleeping disorder. Which is an odd name for it, since it involves sleeping the average amount of time for normal people.) They got there around 7:45 or so. Turns out that "something" was "o' clock", so the movie was out. We (they) decided to go to Joe's Crab Shack instead. I'd only been there once, with the family, a long time ago.
I was a little behind them going in, since I had to pause and put my shoes on. They had chosen a booth near the entrance and sat next to each other on one side, leaving the other side for me.
(Damn. I'm in the music library typing this, and my battery on my MP3 player/camera just died. My fault for not charging it in like five days or something.)
We talked. Shelley is, as it turns out, bat-shit insane. Completely. I mean, I am too, as is Lilie, but I didn't know Shelley was as well. I should have suspected as much upon learning how much her and Lilie hung out, but I never really was faced with the glaring reality of the situation, which pales in comparison to my pre-conceiived notion. Of the scalar quantity of the bat-shit which is equivalent to her insanity.
Or something like that.
I was being really shy, really quiet. It was mainly becase this was really the first time I'd hung out with Shelley outside of work, and you'll (whoever you are) be glad to know that I'm quite over that now (as I'll reveal when/if/no, definitely when I finally get caught up with my life. Which used to take five seconds, so I guess being two weeks behind is something of an improvement.)
Shelley did most of the talking, and the majority of the talking Lilie and I did was in response to her. She's definitely the most-extroverted of the three of us (well, there was a time when I could stake a decent challenge to that throne, but for now, it's definitely hers, with Lilie a close second). She made a number of comments on the group of frat boys hanging out at the bar - comments about how she wouldn't mind sticking her toungue down the throat of a few, or all, of them. Or something like that.
Turns out she's really, really into sex. Lots of it. As, I learned that night (during the converation, not first-hand) is Lilie. In fact, they frequently commented on their similiarities. Shelley asked me, point-blank and without any real preamble, why I liked Lilie and not her. That's kind of a weird question to ask someone, but it seemed to fit. However, I was very much on the defensive at that point, and wasn't really sure how to answer it. The thing I ended up saying is something that still echoes in my mind as one of my stupider things. Well, not really. I've said some really stupid things, and this wasn't that stupid in comparison. But on an absolute scale, in the context of a guy talking to two hot girls, one of whom he likes and both of whom may like him, it was pretty stupid.
"I met her first."
Yeah. I really said that.
Which isn't the case at all, of course. (For a more in-depth discussion of that topic, see later posts. I don't have time for it right now).
In fact, I'm going to call it here, because I have a test in like fifteen minutes and could use some more studying (because it's an Intro to Fine Arts test).
But I'm taking a day off today (other than this test, of course), and after a good DDR session, am going to go home and (attempt t0) clean my room, watch some MST3K, burn some CDs, and finish this lengthy epic.
Or at least get a few more chapters out of the way.
Back to catching up on the Lilie saga (soon to be released in hardcover):
I finally get out of work slightly ahead of Shelley, and call Lilie and tell her I told Shelley to come along. She seemed okay with this, so we talked about going to the movie. I knew it started at "7 something", so we decided on 7:30 (it made sense at the time. I think). I got there a little early, being lonely and having no life (well, that's changing now - it's like Monday, October 25th as I finally get around to writing this. I think I'm a week or two behind. But that's because of my recent sleeping disorder. Which is an odd name for it, since it involves sleeping the average amount of time for normal people.) They got there around 7:45 or so. Turns out that "something" was "o' clock", so the movie was out. We (they) decided to go to Joe's Crab Shack instead. I'd only been there once, with the family, a long time ago.
I was a little behind them going in, since I had to pause and put my shoes on. They had chosen a booth near the entrance and sat next to each other on one side, leaving the other side for me.
(Damn. I'm in the music library typing this, and my battery on my MP3 player/camera just died. My fault for not charging it in like five days or something.)
We talked. Shelley is, as it turns out, bat-shit insane. Completely. I mean, I am too, as is Lilie, but I didn't know Shelley was as well. I should have suspected as much upon learning how much her and Lilie hung out, but I never really was faced with the glaring reality of the situation, which pales in comparison to my pre-conceiived notion. Of the scalar quantity of the bat-shit which is equivalent to her insanity.
Or something like that.
I was being really shy, really quiet. It was mainly becase this was really the first time I'd hung out with Shelley outside of work, and you'll (whoever you are) be glad to know that I'm quite over that now (as I'll reveal when/if/no, definitely when I finally get caught up with my life. Which used to take five seconds, so I guess being two weeks behind is something of an improvement.)
Shelley did most of the talking, and the majority of the talking Lilie and I did was in response to her. She's definitely the most-extroverted of the three of us (well, there was a time when I could stake a decent challenge to that throne, but for now, it's definitely hers, with Lilie a close second). She made a number of comments on the group of frat boys hanging out at the bar - comments about how she wouldn't mind sticking her toungue down the throat of a few, or all, of them. Or something like that.
Turns out she's really, really into sex. Lots of it. As, I learned that night (during the converation, not first-hand) is Lilie. In fact, they frequently commented on their similiarities. Shelley asked me, point-blank and without any real preamble, why I liked Lilie and not her. That's kind of a weird question to ask someone, but it seemed to fit. However, I was very much on the defensive at that point, and wasn't really sure how to answer it. The thing I ended up saying is something that still echoes in my mind as one of my stupider things. Well, not really. I've said some really stupid things, and this wasn't that stupid in comparison. But on an absolute scale, in the context of a guy talking to two hot girls, one of whom he likes and both of whom may like him, it was pretty stupid.
"I met her first."
Yeah. I really said that.
Which isn't the case at all, of course. (For a more in-depth discussion of that topic, see later posts. I don't have time for it right now).
In fact, I'm going to call it here, because I have a test in like fifteen minutes and could use some more studying (because it's an Intro to Fine Arts test).
But I'm taking a day off today (other than this test, of course), and after a good DDR session, am going to go home and (attempt t0) clean my room, watch some MST3K, burn some CDs, and finish this lengthy epic.
Or at least get a few more chapters out of the way.
2004-10-22
Our first kiss won't be the last touch
Something's wrong.
I've been sleeping *way* too much lately. Seriously. The last week or so, I've been getting like 8 - 10 hours of sleep every night, usually by falling asleep incredibly early (sometimes as early as like 10 or so). A lot of people respond to that statement by saying "Well, that's good! You should be getting that much sleep."
I disagree. I'm used to getting 2 - 5 hours of sleep a night. When I get that amount, I feel refreshed and energetic the next day, if occasionally a bit tired every once in a while.
When I get this new amount of sleep, which is more in line with "normal" requirements for sleep, I'm very, very tired all the time. I actually fell asleep in Probability on Wednesday, something I've never done before. Also, after waking up, I have trouble getting up - I just want to lie around with my eyes closed more. Whereas when I get 2 - 5 hours of sleep, I'm awake in a few instants and ready to face the day.
But I'll be attempting to reverse the trend today, and return to a more normal state.
I'll get around to posting the summary of the last week at some point.
Also, I had an incredibly good time hanging out with Lilie and Shelley last night, watching movies (a movie) at Shelley's pad, and if I understand it correctly, we're doing it again tonight, though I won't have to leave this time. Although Shelley's boyfriend will be there. But they're generally well-behaved in front of other people. Or so Lilie says.
I've been sleeping *way* too much lately. Seriously. The last week or so, I've been getting like 8 - 10 hours of sleep every night, usually by falling asleep incredibly early (sometimes as early as like 10 or so). A lot of people respond to that statement by saying "Well, that's good! You should be getting that much sleep."
I disagree. I'm used to getting 2 - 5 hours of sleep a night. When I get that amount, I feel refreshed and energetic the next day, if occasionally a bit tired every once in a while.
When I get this new amount of sleep, which is more in line with "normal" requirements for sleep, I'm very, very tired all the time. I actually fell asleep in Probability on Wednesday, something I've never done before. Also, after waking up, I have trouble getting up - I just want to lie around with my eyes closed more. Whereas when I get 2 - 5 hours of sleep, I'm awake in a few instants and ready to face the day.
But I'll be attempting to reverse the trend today, and return to a more normal state.
I'll get around to posting the summary of the last week at some point.
Also, I had an incredibly good time hanging out with Lilie and Shelley last night, watching movies (a movie) at Shelley's pad, and if I understand it correctly, we're doing it again tonight, though I won't have to leave this time. Although Shelley's boyfriend will be there. But they're generally well-behaved in front of other people. Or so Lilie says.
2004-10-20
Bring me back to when we met; let's start all over
Wow, a lot more hits lately, and not only that, but people appear to actually be reading more and staying longer.
Crazy.
I just wish I knew who they were - a simple comment or something? That'd be awesome. But I can dream, which is probably all that will be.
Anyway.
So things have been a little hectic lately. Not really. I just haven't had the energy to sit and post. Which is odd, because it's in no way physically strenuous. I suppose it's just kind of emotionally draining. That, and it can take a while. Oh, and I also don't like writing.
Let's go topically.
Work: Work's been going okay lately. I ran the shift Saturday, since Mark was supposed to be the day manager. Javi came in for a few hours, but left about two, since I had a full crew.
Sort of. My cooks could handle it okay - Thomas R., Thomas C. (yes, he's really back), Scott, and Pedro. Although they kept putting Pedro on #1, which meant burgers kept going late, and it was just really frustrating. I had Chelsea, Bruce, and Megan in the fountain. Chelsea (White, not Williams, which would just be weird(er)) is, well, not that great in the fountain, and doesn't appear to be interested in learning the boards at all, which is not a good thing. Megan definitely is improving, and started doing the boards consistently. At least my carhops handled their end okay - Kristen (T), Lacy, Shelley, and Kym. I really enjoy working with Kristen; Kym seems to be very cool as well. Lacy tends to whine a lot, but is otherwise okay, and Shelley... that's just another story. She is, after all, batshit insane.
Worked Sunday as well, nothing mind-blowingly exciting there.
I'm opening three times this week - Tuesday, Thursday, and Sunday. Saturday, I'm working 8 - 2. Tuesday went okay, though I mis-entered Javi's code (transposed the two middle digits), which set of the alarm. Which was scary as hell. I had to call our security people and talk to them (and keep saying my name was Javier Estrada), and I wasn't sure when to say the secret code word, so I just kept saying it randomly whenever I had to talk to a new person. Other than that, nothing major.
I'm done with what I came in here (the computer lab in Derrick) to do, so I'll pick this back up tonight.
Crazy.
I just wish I knew who they were - a simple comment or something? That'd be awesome. But I can dream, which is probably all that will be.
Anyway.
So things have been a little hectic lately. Not really. I just haven't had the energy to sit and post. Which is odd, because it's in no way physically strenuous. I suppose it's just kind of emotionally draining. That, and it can take a while. Oh, and I also don't like writing.
Let's go topically.
Work: Work's been going okay lately. I ran the shift Saturday, since Mark was supposed to be the day manager. Javi came in for a few hours, but left about two, since I had a full crew.
Sort of. My cooks could handle it okay - Thomas R., Thomas C. (yes, he's really back), Scott, and Pedro. Although they kept putting Pedro on #1, which meant burgers kept going late, and it was just really frustrating. I had Chelsea, Bruce, and Megan in the fountain. Chelsea (White, not Williams, which would just be weird(er)) is, well, not that great in the fountain, and doesn't appear to be interested in learning the boards at all, which is not a good thing. Megan definitely is improving, and started doing the boards consistently. At least my carhops handled their end okay - Kristen (T), Lacy, Shelley, and Kym. I really enjoy working with Kristen; Kym seems to be very cool as well. Lacy tends to whine a lot, but is otherwise okay, and Shelley... that's just another story. She is, after all, batshit insane.
Worked Sunday as well, nothing mind-blowingly exciting there.
I'm opening three times this week - Tuesday, Thursday, and Sunday. Saturday, I'm working 8 - 2. Tuesday went okay, though I mis-entered Javi's code (transposed the two middle digits), which set of the alarm. Which was scary as hell. I had to call our security people and talk to them (and keep saying my name was Javier Estrada), and I wasn't sure when to say the secret code word, so I just kept saying it randomly whenever I had to talk to a new person. Other than that, nothing major.
I'm done with what I came in here (the computer lab in Derrick) to do, so I'll pick this back up tonight.
I want to be an illusion
Haven't posted for a week or so.
Things have been crazy, and I've been sleeping a lot. So we'll get back to what's happened this week (not much, by the way).
But I did just have a crazy dream. I don't remember parts of it, but I did make out with Lilie at the end. For a little bit. Then she said something about me having to decide, because if we continued, it would lead to sex, and she knew I'm usually... hesitant about that.
Eerie. Well, not that much, since we're just friends. But still kinda eerie.
Things have been crazy, and I've been sleeping a lot. So we'll get back to what's happened this week (not much, by the way).
But I did just have a crazy dream. I don't remember parts of it, but I did make out with Lilie at the end. For a little bit. Then she said something about me having to decide, because if we continued, it would lead to sex, and she knew I'm usually... hesitant about that.
Eerie. Well, not that much, since we're just friends. But still kinda eerie.
2004-10-17
Aurora ft. Naimee Coleman: Ordinary World
I've gotten a number of hits from people searching for the phrase "I won't cry for yesterday', which is from the song 'Ordinary World' by Aurora ft. Naimee Coleman. It appears on one of the DDRs (7th mix?) as well as some other bemani. Here are the lyrics for the complete version:
Came in from a rainy Thursday on the avenue
Thought I heard you talking softly
I turned on the lights, the TV and the radio
Still I can't escape the ghost of you
What is happening to it all?
Crazy some say
Where is the life that I recognize?
Gone away
* But I won't cry for yesterday
There's an ordinary world
somehow I have to find
And as I try to make my way to
the ordinary world
I will learn to survive
Passion or coincidence
once prompted you to say
Pride will tear us both apart
Well now pride's gone out the window
Cross the rooftops, runaway
Left me in the vacuum of my heart
What is happening to me?
Crazy some say
Where is my friend when I need you most?
Gone away
* repeat
Papers in the roadside tell of suffering and greed
Feared today forgot tomorrow
Here beside the news of holy war and holy need
Ours is just a little sorrowed talk
Blown away
Just blowing away
And don't cry for yesterday
There's an ordinary world
somehow I have to find
And as I try to make my way to
the ordinary world
I will learn to survive
Every world is my world
Any world is my world
Came in from a rainy Thursday on the avenue
Thought I heard you talking softly
I turned on the lights, the TV and the radio
Still I can't escape the ghost of you
What is happening to it all?
Crazy some say
Where is the life that I recognize?
Gone away
* But I won't cry for yesterday
There's an ordinary world
somehow I have to find
And as I try to make my way to
the ordinary world
I will learn to survive
Passion or coincidence
once prompted you to say
Pride will tear us both apart
Well now pride's gone out the window
Cross the rooftops, runaway
Left me in the vacuum of my heart
What is happening to me?
Crazy some say
Where is my friend when I need you most?
Gone away
* repeat
Papers in the roadside tell of suffering and greed
Feared today forgot tomorrow
Here beside the news of holy war and holy need
Ours is just a little sorrowed talk
Blown away
Just blowing away
And don't cry for yesterday
There's an ordinary world
somehow I have to find
And as I try to make my way to
the ordinary world
I will learn to survive
Every world is my world
Any world is my world
2004-10-15
Oh, yeah
I got my new phone working. Mom went and got a new sim card while I was pulling a 13 hour double, open to 7-ish. It's pretty cool, though I did lose all of my phone numbers, which is fairly annoying. The only people whose number I have are those I remember off the top of my head, and those I've seen in the last day or two.
Updates
New quiz - What file extension are you?
New Winamp Playlist up - Added The soundtracks from all 5 Star Wars movies and Shadows of the Empire; Shakira - Laundry Service
New Winamp Playlist up - Added The soundtracks from all 5 Star Wars movies and Shadows of the Empire; Shakira - Laundry Service
2004-10-14
Light up the night when our arms reunite, Sei carina
So I'm about to go and open for the first time by myself. Erica's my carhop, which is good. I got Mark's keys, but not my own code yet, so I have to use Javi's. Ray had me go up there last night and practice opening the safe. It sounds like they're going to start have me run shifts (completely) next week.
Scary stuff.
I'll try to post the rest of the Tuesday night stuff, along with what happaned yesterday (all about Lilie, of course, even though we're most likely just friends. Which is fine).
Oh, and my phone's out right now (broken SIM card, so if I don't answer or call you back, that's why.
Not like anyone calls me anyway, but just in case they do *and* happen to read this.
Right.
Scary stuff.
I'll try to post the rest of the Tuesday night stuff, along with what happaned yesterday (all about Lilie, of course, even though we're most likely just friends. Which is fine).
Oh, and my phone's out right now (broken SIM card, so if I don't answer or call you back, that's why.
Not like anyone calls me anyway, but just in case they do *and* happen to read this.
Right.
2004-10-13
Tearing down windows and doors, but I still can't find eyes like yours
Sitting in the computer lab before chem again.
I've come to a very important conclusion: Shelley is batshit insane.
Seriously.
Bat. Shit. Insane.
But we'll come back to that.
Tuesday at work was interesting. I found out Mark quit Monday morning, which makes me infinitely happy. Seriously. Javi gave me his store key and deposit key this morning, so I'm one step closer to becoming a real assistant manager (I've already heard my name float around while people are comparing managers, which is cool if somewhat weird). It was a fun shift - Allison and Kenny fountaining, Tracy, Shelley, Ashley, and Erica carhopping. Tracy opened, so she left around 1 or 2. Ashley was supposed to leave around 2, but Ray had to take Javi home (he opened for Mark) and take him to get a new battery for his car; they left me in charge. Which makes sense, since I'm an assistant now. Anyway, I went ahead and sent Ashley home as well, since it was like 2:30 and labor was high. That left Shelley and Erica carhopping. Shelley told me she hadn't gone out with Lilie Monday night as planned, but they had talked and had some interesting things to tell me.
Apparently:
I'm insocialable
I don't know how to act around people
I'm shy
I have poor phone etiquette
I don't talk enough on the phone, leaving long, awkward silences that some people (Shelley) feel the the need to ramble to fill
Hmm.
I could have told you most of those.
She also told me that she liked me, but that because Lilie was going to give it a shot, she wasn't going to. Or something like that. She also said that Lilie had said that "she could have me" which makes no sense given the previous sentence. So I don't know.
Anyway.
Shelley told me Lilie had invited her to go to the movies with us last night, but that Shelley said 'no' because she thought that I wanted it to be 'special-time' for Lilie and me, or a date, or something like that. I dissuaded her of that notion - we're just friends, right? - and told her she should come. Then she said something about not wanting to see me and Lilie being all smoochy-smoochy. Right. I then told her that I didn't really plan to 'make any moves' since we're just friends and all, but she said that it was obvious that I was infatuated with Lilie since day one. Which isn't quite true - they're misconstruing a comment I made the first time I saw her.
And, in case you're worried that all this "she said that she said" type stuff is confusing, don't worry. A) I was there, and I can't follow it very well either, and B) it gets worse. Just wait 'til all three of us are together. Which we were last night. And I'll talk about that later, since it's time to go to class.
I've come to a very important conclusion: Shelley is batshit insane.
Seriously.
Bat. Shit. Insane.
But we'll come back to that.
Tuesday at work was interesting. I found out Mark quit Monday morning, which makes me infinitely happy. Seriously. Javi gave me his store key and deposit key this morning, so I'm one step closer to becoming a real assistant manager (I've already heard my name float around while people are comparing managers, which is cool if somewhat weird). It was a fun shift - Allison and Kenny fountaining, Tracy, Shelley, Ashley, and Erica carhopping. Tracy opened, so she left around 1 or 2. Ashley was supposed to leave around 2, but Ray had to take Javi home (he opened for Mark) and take him to get a new battery for his car; they left me in charge. Which makes sense, since I'm an assistant now. Anyway, I went ahead and sent Ashley home as well, since it was like 2:30 and labor was high. That left Shelley and Erica carhopping. Shelley told me she hadn't gone out with Lilie Monday night as planned, but they had talked and had some interesting things to tell me.
Apparently:
Hmm.
I could have told you most of those.
She also told me that she liked me, but that because Lilie was going to give it a shot, she wasn't going to. Or something like that. She also said that Lilie had said that "she could have me" which makes no sense given the previous sentence. So I don't know.
Anyway.
Shelley told me Lilie had invited her to go to the movies with us last night, but that Shelley said 'no' because she thought that I wanted it to be 'special-time' for Lilie and me, or a date, or something like that. I dissuaded her of that notion - we're just friends, right? - and told her she should come. Then she said something about not wanting to see me and Lilie being all smoochy-smoochy. Right. I then told her that I didn't really plan to 'make any moves' since we're just friends and all, but she said that it was obvious that I was infatuated with Lilie since day one. Which isn't quite true - they're misconstruing a comment I made the first time I saw her.
And, in case you're worried that all this "she said that she said" type stuff is confusing, don't worry. A) I was there, and I can't follow it very well either, and B) it gets worse. Just wait 'til all three of us are together. Which we were last night. And I'll talk about that later, since it's time to go to class.
2004-10-12
Questa è la mia casa
I think I'm going to do it. Something I've never really done before, something that may lead to me turning over a whole new leaf, a new phase in life, or something like that. I had a revelation last night while driving around, one that (to quote G'Kar) transforms your spirit, your sould, even your flesh, such that you are a new creature, born in the moment of understanding.
And here I am.
And here I am.
Do I stress you out? My sweater's on backwards and inside-out.
And now for something completely different.
Or not. It'll probably just be more of the same.
Analysis time.
So I called Lilie on Sunday after work to ask her what was up. I'm not really one to just listen to someone saying something about someone else saying something. I'll ask the person in question (the first one) what they said and what they meant, if I care. Which I really do, in this case.
So I called her and asked her about it. She said, well, it's kind of confusing what she said. She said that yes, she does just want to be friends, but seemed to imply that she wanted to start there and 'see what happens'. Now, I'm not dumb - I know that that usually means they just want to be friends and they're trying not to hurt you. I initially thought that as well with Lilie, and I've not entirely moved from that position. It made several things make more sense - why she seemed somewhat hesitant to kiss (though that may still be just me), among other things.
I went by Sonic today with Michael to grab a drink, and Shelley was there. We talked briefly; she said that Lilie and her had hung out last night and were going to do so again. She also said that she was "willing to give it a shot", and what more could I want? Which is confusing, in light of what Lilie said Sunday.
So I'm going to try do something I've never been terribly good at doing. I'm going to stop thinking so hard about it, stop analyzing everything. Those who've known me for long enough (no one) will remember that I tried to do something similiar with Zara about three years ago, to no avail. Of course, there's one key difference here. Zara had no interest in me whatsoever, and barely tolerated me as a friend, and a blind wombat 100 miles away could tell, whereas I don't think it's too much of a stretch to say that Lilie may be, at least somewhat slightly interested in me. So I don't know, nor will I attempt to do so until such time that it's obvious and apparent without over-analyzing everything.
So we're just friends now, and if something happens, something happens. If not, cool - friends are hard enough to come by as it is. Though I'll admit I was in a world of hurt for about a day or so between talking to Lilie and realizing all of this. It wasn't the rejection that hurt - I mean, it *was*; rejection always hurts - but that it had caught me so off-guard. I had lowered my defenses completely and was blind-sided. It was just funny that the one time I let myself believe, that I listened to everyone else, that a girl was interested in me and wanted to move foward, it wasn't true. Well, not really. There's a small chance it will still happen, and while I might look foward to such an occurence with great anticipation, I'm not counting on it. I'm really going to try hard to just sit back and enjoy the ride.
I really wish Mindy would call. If nothing else, and this is at the very least, it'd be good to talk to her and possibly hang out with her a little. A hug? That'd be grand. I hope she didn't think I wasn't interested based on my actions when we talked. I was really, really tired and was still in a state of shock at seeing her again, especially with her being all grown up and all. Someone called me today while I was in Probability, but I couldn't take it for obvious reasons. They didn't leave a message, and the number said "Private Number". Normally, it's Luke when it does that, but I called and it wasn't him. I think he said something to the effect that he's finally changed his phone so it doesn't do that anymore. I called the people most likely to call me - Mom, Janelle, Lilie, etc., but it wasn't any of them - nor did I think it would be. There's a small chance it was Caleb; I'll find out the next time I talk to him. I'll also let him know to stop calling. I really have no interest in talking to him anymore. I'm not mad or anything, I'm just severing ties. So I think it was either Caleb or Mindy. I don't really know why I think that, it's just a feeling. And I'm usually wrong about these kinds of things, so we'll see. But if it was her, I hope she'll call again.
So I did call Lilie today, supposedly to ask her if she had called earlier. I knew it wasn' t her, but it provided a decent excuse for calling. I'm fairly awkward on the phone - not that I'm not in person, but silence is more bearable in person, I think. We talked a little; I told her I didn't hate her or anything and hoped to still hang out and what-not. She's going to be there Thursday at Dragon's Lair, and it sounds like we'll be going to fifty-cent movie night at Showplace again. They have both The Village and Spider-Man 2. So that'll be fun. Dave's still on vacation or whereever he went, so work won't be very bad at all tomorrow. I've definitely got a handle on dong the deposit, which means it probably won't be *that* long before I'm completely running a shift. We'll see how that goes.
Or not. It'll probably just be more of the same.
Analysis time.
So I called Lilie on Sunday after work to ask her what was up. I'm not really one to just listen to someone saying something about someone else saying something. I'll ask the person in question (the first one) what they said and what they meant, if I care. Which I really do, in this case.
So I called her and asked her about it. She said, well, it's kind of confusing what she said. She said that yes, she does just want to be friends, but seemed to imply that she wanted to start there and 'see what happens'. Now, I'm not dumb - I know that that usually means they just want to be friends and they're trying not to hurt you. I initially thought that as well with Lilie, and I've not entirely moved from that position. It made several things make more sense - why she seemed somewhat hesitant to kiss (though that may still be just me), among other things.
I went by Sonic today with Michael to grab a drink, and Shelley was there. We talked briefly; she said that Lilie and her had hung out last night and were going to do so again. She also said that she was "willing to give it a shot", and what more could I want? Which is confusing, in light of what Lilie said Sunday.
So I'm going to try do something I've never been terribly good at doing. I'm going to stop thinking so hard about it, stop analyzing everything. Those who've known me for long enough (no one) will remember that I tried to do something similiar with Zara about three years ago, to no avail. Of course, there's one key difference here. Zara had no interest in me whatsoever, and barely tolerated me as a friend, and a blind wombat 100 miles away could tell, whereas I don't think it's too much of a stretch to say that Lilie may be, at least somewhat slightly interested in me. So I don't know, nor will I attempt to do so until such time that it's obvious and apparent without over-analyzing everything.
So we're just friends now, and if something happens, something happens. If not, cool - friends are hard enough to come by as it is. Though I'll admit I was in a world of hurt for about a day or so between talking to Lilie and realizing all of this. It wasn't the rejection that hurt - I mean, it *was*; rejection always hurts - but that it had caught me so off-guard. I had lowered my defenses completely and was blind-sided. It was just funny that the one time I let myself believe, that I listened to everyone else, that a girl was interested in me and wanted to move foward, it wasn't true. Well, not really. There's a small chance it will still happen, and while I might look foward to such an occurence with great anticipation, I'm not counting on it. I'm really going to try hard to just sit back and enjoy the ride.
I really wish Mindy would call. If nothing else, and this is at the very least, it'd be good to talk to her and possibly hang out with her a little. A hug? That'd be grand. I hope she didn't think I wasn't interested based on my actions when we talked. I was really, really tired and was still in a state of shock at seeing her again, especially with her being all grown up and all. Someone called me today while I was in Probability, but I couldn't take it for obvious reasons. They didn't leave a message, and the number said "Private Number". Normally, it's Luke when it does that, but I called and it wasn't him. I think he said something to the effect that he's finally changed his phone so it doesn't do that anymore. I called the people most likely to call me - Mom, Janelle, Lilie, etc., but it wasn't any of them - nor did I think it would be. There's a small chance it was Caleb; I'll find out the next time I talk to him. I'll also let him know to stop calling. I really have no interest in talking to him anymore. I'm not mad or anything, I'm just severing ties. So I think it was either Caleb or Mindy. I don't really know why I think that, it's just a feeling. And I'm usually wrong about these kinds of things, so we'll see. But if it was her, I hope she'll call again.
So I did call Lilie today, supposedly to ask her if she had called earlier. I knew it wasn' t her, but it provided a decent excuse for calling. I'm fairly awkward on the phone - not that I'm not in person, but silence is more bearable in person, I think. We talked a little; I told her I didn't hate her or anything and hoped to still hang out and what-not. She's going to be there Thursday at Dragon's Lair, and it sounds like we'll be going to fifty-cent movie night at Showplace again. They have both The Village and Spider-Man 2. So that'll be fun. Dave's still on vacation or whereever he went, so work won't be very bad at all tomorrow. I've definitely got a handle on dong the deposit, which means it probably won't be *that* long before I'm completely running a shift. We'll see how that goes.
New Site Feature: Winamp Playlist
I've added a link to my current winamp playlist, using Winamp's 'Genereate an HTML playlist' feature. I'll update it fairly frequently, after obtaining a significant number of new tracks.
Also, a stat update, now that the profiles are working again:
Also, a stat update, now that the profiles are working again:
User Stats
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2004-10-11
I ain't gonna be just a face in the crowd; you're gonna hear my voice when I shout it out loud
It has come to my attention that in my previous post, I failed to do any analysis, and actually just did another summary of the event in question.
Mea culpa.
However, since I'm in between CS and Probability right now and only really have five minutes or so, I'm not going to correct that. I'm just going to post a few humorous incidents from the party.
So I was wearing my DDR Life t-shirt. Yes, I'm that big of a geek, especially when it comes to DDR. So Emily is standing right across the porch from me and notices it. She asks, quite possibly, the funniest question I've ever been asked.
"When you go to clubs, do you bust out your DDR moves?"
She didn't have any joking tones in her voice, which is what makes it so funny. So I explained to her that not only do I not go to clubs, nor have I ever been to one, I can't dance, DDR has very little to do with dancing (it requires only rhythm; dancing really requires both rhythm and style; I lack the latter completely). It was just really a funny moment.
Little Dave was there with Sunny, and wouldn't say anything to me at all. I greeted him several times, but got no response. Apparently, he didn't really talk to anyone there from Sonic. Good.
Allison pulled me aside to give me her 'advice' she had spoken of earlier. It was pretty basic stuff - be confident, but not cocky; suprise her, but not too often; show her you care, and that she's special to you, but don't be a stalker or obsessive; and finally, don't hang around in a bad relationship just because you're scared of being alone. She admitted the final point was somewhat hypocritical, as she is doing exactly that - JR has cheated on her in the past, but she is still with him. She told me that she has fairly low self-esteem and has trouble believing people would like her, so when someone does, she'll put up with a lot. She also went on a sort of side-trail about me being a great guy and not really needing any of this advice. Which was kinda funny. That, and knowing *exactly* how she felt about the self-esteem issue.
Kenny brought his snake out for a while (an actual snake, not a penis or something). Freaked a couple of girls out, but he's a fairly docile reptile.
I did talk to Katie for a bit; she had already heard about me becoming an assistant (interesting to see the Sonic grapevine at work when it's about me), and was curious if there was something between Lilie and I.
I got to meet Kristen's little sister. They look *so* similiar, it's hilarious.
Mea culpa.
However, since I'm in between CS and Probability right now and only really have five minutes or so, I'm not going to correct that. I'm just going to post a few humorous incidents from the party.
So I was wearing my DDR Life t-shirt. Yes, I'm that big of a geek, especially when it comes to DDR. So Emily is standing right across the porch from me and notices it. She asks, quite possibly, the funniest question I've ever been asked.
"When you go to clubs, do you bust out your DDR moves?"
She didn't have any joking tones in her voice, which is what makes it so funny. So I explained to her that not only do I not go to clubs, nor have I ever been to one, I can't dance, DDR has very little to do with dancing (it requires only rhythm; dancing really requires both rhythm and style; I lack the latter completely). It was just really a funny moment.
Little Dave was there with Sunny, and wouldn't say anything to me at all. I greeted him several times, but got no response. Apparently, he didn't really talk to anyone there from Sonic. Good.
Allison pulled me aside to give me her 'advice' she had spoken of earlier. It was pretty basic stuff - be confident, but not cocky; suprise her, but not too often; show her you care, and that she's special to you, but don't be a stalker or obsessive; and finally, don't hang around in a bad relationship just because you're scared of being alone. She admitted the final point was somewhat hypocritical, as she is doing exactly that - JR has cheated on her in the past, but she is still with him. She told me that she has fairly low self-esteem and has trouble believing people would like her, so when someone does, she'll put up with a lot. She also went on a sort of side-trail about me being a great guy and not really needing any of this advice. Which was kinda funny. That, and knowing *exactly* how she felt about the self-esteem issue.
Kenny brought his snake out for a while (an actual snake, not a penis or something). Freaked a couple of girls out, but he's a fairly docile reptile.
I did talk to Katie for a bit; she had already heard about me becoming an assistant (interesting to see the Sonic grapevine at work when it's about me), and was curious if there was something between Lilie and I.
I got to meet Kristen's little sister. They look *so* similiar, it's hilarious.
Come take my hand; come and dance with me; My sweet lips will make you stay
I'm in the lab at school, before chem class, and I'm going to see how much of my previous post I can recreate before I have to go to class.
So the barbacue really was a lot of fun. Most of the Sonic crew was there, except for the cooks and managers. Managers for obvious reasons (and by 'managers', I mean Javi, Dave, and Mark; Rudy, Ray, and I were there). The cooks have been going through a shift in demographical makeup. That, and our turnover rate is a lot higher with cooks, so they're not meeting the rest of the crew as much, *and* it takes them a lot longer since they're in the kitchen the whole time anyway. Freddie was the only cook there. Most of the front crew was there - Kenny (it was his place, after all), Tracy, Megan, Kristen, Erin, Katie, Emily, Erica, Allison, Sunny, and probably one or two more that I'm forgetting.
It was cool seeing Katie there; as usual, her and I were the only ones not drinking. Normally, under those circumstances, I'd be hanging out with her, but I had... other things to tend to. If you know what I mean. Which I don't.
It was kind of funny. Kenny has a little porch outside of his house; that's where the two kegs were. He also had some Rt 44 cups from work. For a while, it was kind of a 'VIP' lounge for Sonic employees, and even after that, that's where most of us hung out, except for the ones that went inside.
I hung out with Lilie all night. We mainly hung out on the porch and talked with the rest of the crew. It was a lot of fun. At one point, Erin's roommate asked her if I was her boyfriend. After a noticeable moment of silence, she said 'No. It's probably for the best. He's my boy.' and rubbed my on the back. Or something like that. I felt really sad. I almost left, but it's probably for the best that I didn't.
I didn't drink, as usual. I did have around 11 cups of water or so. Lilie tried to get me to drink, but she has no idea how stubborn I can be. She will, though. Possibly. She had a few beers, nothing too heavy. At one point, I did finally put my arm around her. It was weird - she responded. She kind of cuddled up next to me and reciprocated, for the most part. Later, she started tickling me. It wasn't really fair, 'cause she's not ticklish at all. So the only real way I could defend myself (as those who have known me for a long time know I'm *extremely* ticklish) was to hold both her hands. Which I did. And she held mine back. She did try once or twice to escape, but she seemed... content to do so. Be held and hold, I mean. She did like, it's hard to explain, lean in a little and just look at me. It was weird. A little bit after that, she started to get tired and left. Well, not quite that quickly. I walked her to her car (there were a *lot* of cars parked in Kenny's front yard; luckily, she had a clear path out), and we stood outside it for a bit, talking.
Did we kiss? You'll have to come back for part three of this enthralling post, as I have to go to Chem class now.
So the barbacue really was a lot of fun. Most of the Sonic crew was there, except for the cooks and managers. Managers for obvious reasons (and by 'managers', I mean Javi, Dave, and Mark; Rudy, Ray, and I were there). The cooks have been going through a shift in demographical makeup. That, and our turnover rate is a lot higher with cooks, so they're not meeting the rest of the crew as much, *and* it takes them a lot longer since they're in the kitchen the whole time anyway. Freddie was the only cook there. Most of the front crew was there - Kenny (it was his place, after all), Tracy, Megan, Kristen, Erin, Katie, Emily, Erica, Allison, Sunny, and probably one or two more that I'm forgetting.
It was cool seeing Katie there; as usual, her and I were the only ones not drinking. Normally, under those circumstances, I'd be hanging out with her, but I had... other things to tend to. If you know what I mean. Which I don't.
It was kind of funny. Kenny has a little porch outside of his house; that's where the two kegs were. He also had some Rt 44 cups from work. For a while, it was kind of a 'VIP' lounge for Sonic employees, and even after that, that's where most of us hung out, except for the ones that went inside.
I hung out with Lilie all night. We mainly hung out on the porch and talked with the rest of the crew. It was a lot of fun. At one point, Erin's roommate asked her if I was her boyfriend. After a noticeable moment of silence, she said 'No. It's probably for the best. He's my boy.' and rubbed my on the back. Or something like that. I felt really sad. I almost left, but it's probably for the best that I didn't.
I didn't drink, as usual. I did have around 11 cups of water or so. Lilie tried to get me to drink, but she has no idea how stubborn I can be. She will, though. Possibly. She had a few beers, nothing too heavy. At one point, I did finally put my arm around her. It was weird - she responded. She kind of cuddled up next to me and reciprocated, for the most part. Later, she started tickling me. It wasn't really fair, 'cause she's not ticklish at all. So the only real way I could defend myself (as those who have known me for a long time know I'm *extremely* ticklish) was to hold both her hands. Which I did. And she held mine back. She did try once or twice to escape, but she seemed... content to do so. Be held and hold, I mean. She did like, it's hard to explain, lean in a little and just look at me. It was weird. A little bit after that, she started to get tired and left. Well, not quite that quickly. I walked her to her car (there were a *lot* of cars parked in Kenny's front yard; luckily, she had a clear path out), and we stood outside it for a bit, talking.
Did we kiss? You'll have to come back for part three of this enthralling post, as I have to go to Chem class now.
Addendum
I just wrote this really, really long post doing all sorts of analyzation on the relationship between Lilie and I.
And it lost it all, except the title.
That's nice.
And it lost it all, except the title.
That's nice.
Love to love you, baby baby
So our story continues...
Lilie pulls up and joins the group as well. We basically spent the entire evening with each other. Which was cool. After a while, other Sonic crew members starting arriving as well - just about everyone was there (except cooks, of course.) Just off the top of my head: Ray, Rudy, Freddie, Kenny, Tracy, Megan, Erin, Kristen, Emily, Erica, Allison, Sunny, Katie, and probably some others I'm forgetting.
I was surprised Katie showed up. Her and I were the only people there not drinking. Normally under those circumstances, I'd hang out with her, but I was a little... preoccupied. My non-drinking elicited some comments, even from Lilie. She tried to get me to drink a few times, but I stuck with water as normal. Oh, and a DR Pepper.
So yeah, I hung out with Lilie all evening. At one point, Erin's roommate asked if I was her boyfriend. After a moment of silence, she said something along the lines of "No. It's probably better that way. He's my boy." And she rubbed me on the back. I felt really down after that, and almost, almost left. But I didn't. And I think it's a good thing I didn't. So I finally put my arm around her, and she really responded. She like kinda cuddled to me. It felt really nice. Later, she started trying to tickle me. The only way I could get her to stop, or defend myself, was to hold both her hands, since she's not ticklish at all. That went on for maybe fifteen minutes. Before too long, she started to get tired and decided to head home. I walked to her car, and we kinda stood around there for a while. We talked a little, laughed randomly, and kissed. Nothing terribly hot and heavy or anything, just a few short closed-mouths lip-to-lip kisses. Very nice.
Went to work today, and everyone was supporting the hypothesis that she was, in fact, interested in me, in light of her behavior at the party. I finally started to believe them.
So of course, Shelly comes in to get her schedule for next week as I'm working on the deposit, and tells me that Lilie told her (before the barbacue) that she just wants to be friends.
Of course.
Analysis to come.
Lilie pulls up and joins the group as well. We basically spent the entire evening with each other. Which was cool. After a while, other Sonic crew members starting arriving as well - just about everyone was there (except cooks, of course.) Just off the top of my head: Ray, Rudy, Freddie, Kenny, Tracy, Megan, Erin, Kristen, Emily, Erica, Allison, Sunny, Katie, and probably some others I'm forgetting.
I was surprised Katie showed up. Her and I were the only people there not drinking. Normally under those circumstances, I'd hang out with her, but I was a little... preoccupied. My non-drinking elicited some comments, even from Lilie. She tried to get me to drink a few times, but I stuck with water as normal. Oh, and a DR Pepper.
So yeah, I hung out with Lilie all evening. At one point, Erin's roommate asked if I was her boyfriend. After a moment of silence, she said something along the lines of "No. It's probably better that way. He's my boy." And she rubbed me on the back. I felt really down after that, and almost, almost left. But I didn't. And I think it's a good thing I didn't. So I finally put my arm around her, and she really responded. She like kinda cuddled to me. It felt really nice. Later, she started trying to tickle me. The only way I could get her to stop, or defend myself, was to hold both her hands, since she's not ticklish at all. That went on for maybe fifteen minutes. Before too long, she started to get tired and decided to head home. I walked to her car, and we kinda stood around there for a while. We talked a little, laughed randomly, and kissed. Nothing terribly hot and heavy or anything, just a few short closed-mouths lip-to-lip kisses. Very nice.
Went to work today, and everyone was supporting the hypothesis that she was, in fact, interested in me, in light of her behavior at the party. I finally started to believe them.
So of course, Shelly comes in to get her schedule for next week as I'm working on the deposit, and tells me that Lilie told her (before the barbacue) that she just wants to be friends.
Of course.
Analysis to come.
2004-10-10
It's hard to reveal; there's something about you
Thursday night, I went to Dragon's Lair after working another 10 - 5 shift, as well as doing the deposit and taking it to the bank. Got there and we did 5 player Settlers of Catan with Seafarers thrown in. We finally taught Brett and Michael how to play, and we really got into it. I was doing fairly well - constantly tied with Matt R for first place.
I was *really* hyper the whole time as well, because Lilie said she would probably stop by if she got out of work early. Every time the door buzzer would ring, I'd go running over to the door to see who it was. And lo and behold, it was her (eventually). The guys tried to get me to stop, to no avail (of course). The funny thing is that I'm still not very good at recognizing her from a distance, so when it was her, I still went back to my seat like normal. She came down into the cave and something along the lines of "You ADD child". Or something like that.
She told us that she was going to a concert with her friend, so she'd only be there for a little bit. If I'm reading this correctly, and I'm not entirely sure that I am, she stopped by to see me for a bit. Or something like that. We talked for a bit while playing, then she eventually had to go. I walked her out to her car, and we talked more out there. I told her about a barbacue type get together Kenny was having at his place - he had previously invited me, and I asked if I could bring a date or something - "Lilie?" "Yeah." "Go for it." - and asked her if she wanted to go. She seemed fairly enthusiastic about it, so I told her I'd call her tomorrow (Friday) after talking to Kenny with more information. We embraced again, then she left (I believe it was at this point she made a comment about her being a 'huggy person'. Which rocks.)
Friday, class was fun. Sort of. I actually played no DDR, even though the machine was working. I don't mean just a few games, I mean, quite literally, NO DDR. This may be the first class day (except that Monday last week when it wasn't working) that I haven't played DDR. So anyway, I called Kenny when I got home, and he said that because the weather looked ominous, they had postponed the barbacue and were getting together about 9 or so at his place. He gave me directions - he lives out on 21 - and I told him I'd see him there. Relayed as much to Lilie.
9:00 rolled around I and rolled out to Kenny's. I was the first Sonic person to get there, though there were five (or so) of his other friends there. We sat inside and talked for a bit about things, mostly work related - me becoming a manager, the new carhops, the various people quitting, crew unity, a surprisingly wide range of topics. We eventually went back outside, and Lilie eventually pulled up.
I just fell asleep and woke up in time to leave for work, so I'll have to continue this later.
I was *really* hyper the whole time as well, because Lilie said she would probably stop by if she got out of work early. Every time the door buzzer would ring, I'd go running over to the door to see who it was. And lo and behold, it was her (eventually). The guys tried to get me to stop, to no avail (of course). The funny thing is that I'm still not very good at recognizing her from a distance, so when it was her, I still went back to my seat like normal. She came down into the cave and something along the lines of "You ADD child". Or something like that.
She told us that she was going to a concert with her friend, so she'd only be there for a little bit. If I'm reading this correctly, and I'm not entirely sure that I am, she stopped by to see me for a bit. Or something like that. We talked for a bit while playing, then she eventually had to go. I walked her out to her car, and we talked more out there. I told her about a barbacue type get together Kenny was having at his place - he had previously invited me, and I asked if I could bring a date or something - "Lilie?" "Yeah." "Go for it." - and asked her if she wanted to go. She seemed fairly enthusiastic about it, so I told her I'd call her tomorrow (Friday) after talking to Kenny with more information. We embraced again, then she left (I believe it was at this point she made a comment about her being a 'huggy person'. Which rocks.)
Friday, class was fun. Sort of. I actually played no DDR, even though the machine was working. I don't mean just a few games, I mean, quite literally, NO DDR. This may be the first class day (except that Monday last week when it wasn't working) that I haven't played DDR. So anyway, I called Kenny when I got home, and he said that because the weather looked ominous, they had postponed the barbacue and were getting together about 9 or so at his place. He gave me directions - he lives out on 21 - and I told him I'd see him there. Relayed as much to Lilie.
9:00 rolled around I and rolled out to Kenny's. I was the first Sonic person to get there, though there were five (or so) of his other friends there. We sat inside and talked for a bit about things, mostly work related - me becoming a manager, the new carhops, the various people quitting, crew unity, a surprisingly wide range of topics. We eventually went back outside, and Lilie eventually pulled up.
I just fell asleep and woke up in time to leave for work, so I'll have to continue this later.
2004-10-09
I know that you lied to me, using gentle words to shelter me
Went to Kenny's for a party.
It was a lot of fun.
I kissed Lilie.
More to come later.
It was a lot of fun.
I kissed Lilie.
More to come later.
2004-10-08
Sunny came home to her favorite room; Sunny sat down in the kitchen
So Dragon's Lair last night was a blast. Sort of. Long story. I've got about half an hour before I have to leave for school, so I'm not really going to post everything - I'll do that later, possibly tonight.
Yes, Lilie and I hung out. It was fun. Then we hung out some more.
Then we're hanging out some more tonight.
Then I've discovered another torrent site, with music. So that's fun - I've got 11 downloads going right now, most of which should be done by the time I get home from, especially as bandwidth is freed up and allocated to the other ones. Now, as Plif once said, Bit Torrent may not be the end-all, be-all of p2p downloading, but it sure beats the living crap out of previous clients like Kazaa and eDonkey. Seriously.
Yes, Lilie and I hung out. It was fun. Then we hung out some more.
Then we're hanging out some more tonight.
Then I've discovered another torrent site, with music. So that's fun - I've got 11 downloads going right now, most of which should be done by the time I get home from, especially as bandwidth is freed up and allocated to the other ones. Now, as Plif once said, Bit Torrent may not be the end-all, be-all of p2p downloading, but it sure beats the living crap out of previous clients like Kazaa and eDonkey. Seriously.
2004-10-07
Don't tell me; keep your feelings to yourself. Live is far too complicated, all the time anticipating
Two key things I forgot to mention in my last post.
1) Mindy was driving a green F-150 - newer than mine. It was much more rounded, slightly larger. As we were parting she asked me "Do you like my truck?" "It's yours?" "Yep." "It's awesome." Hmm...
2) Sunday afternoon, Lilie came by and quit. Yep - she got a new job at Katy Station. So that's cool - I don't get to see her at work anymore, but it means that if somehow we do end up going out, we won't have to worry about any work-relationship complications. Not saying we're going to or anything, just that that particular block is no longer there.
1) Mindy was driving a green F-150 - newer than mine. It was much more rounded, slightly larger. As we were parting she asked me "Do you like my truck?" "It's yours?" "Yep." "It's awesome." Hmm...
2) Sunday afternoon, Lilie came by and quit. Yep - she got a new job at Katy Station. So that's cool - I don't get to see her at work anymore, but it means that if somehow we do end up going out, we won't have to worry about any work-relationship complications. Not saying we're going to or anything, just that that particular block is no longer there.
2004-10-06
How can I look in your eyes when I feel I can fly? I have to run away.
So when we last left our intrepid hero, he was just getting off of work on Sunday. (Warning: PoV shift back to first person).
I was fairly tired, between the back-to-back 8 - 5 shifts, with the non-stop frenzy of school, work, and DDR I've been doing the past two months or so. I pulled up to my street, and noticed in dismay that all of the convenient parking spots were taken. I initially elected to just park right in front of my driveway. I pulled up behind Jerry's truck, when a green truck pulled up right next to me. There were two girls sitting in the cab, waving at me. I didn't hear if they were saying anything; Paul Oakenfield's 'Send Me An Angel' was playing fairly loud. I paused the music, and the driver asked me a simple question - 'Do you recognize me?' 'No.' 'It's me, Mindy.'
I'm going to repeat that, as it bears repeating. 'It's me, Mindy.'
She then went to park so we could talk in slightly more convenient circumstances. I parked across the street, and tried to compile my thoughts and regain my composure while she walked from her truck to mine. I had NO IDEA what to say - this was Mindy. I haven't seen or talked to her in, um, three years? I was fairly certain she wanted nothing more to do with me. So she walks up to my truck - I'm still sitting in the driver's seat. I still can't get over how much she's changed. She was wearing a bikini type thing (I think, she's becoming a little fuzzy - my visual memory was never very strong, especially when it comes to describing people); she's dropped some weight. She was never very big, but she was... not quite thick, but almost. Solid. She's definitely 'thin' now. She's also aged a lot. Well, I guess that's to be expected. The last time I saw her (before this), she was... 14? 15? She's 18 now - that's a major bit of growing up, especially for girls. So both of those combined, she looks *way* different. She was always attractive, but now, even much more so.
We talked a little bit. She asked me what I'd been up, and I told her. 'Nothing.' Seriously, what have I been up to? Nothing. Told her I was at SWT now; still at Sonic, finally an assistant manager. She also asked me if I was seeing anyone, and I briefly mentioned Suzie, but that other than her, there hadn't been anyone else. She told me she saw a 35 year old for a while (2 years) (I guess that's who Rose saw her with that one time in IHOP), but no one else really other than that. She's going to UTSA, studying psychology (I forgot if that was her major or minor, and what the other one was), working full time in San Antonio. She was living in San Antonio, but she's living her right now to help take care of her grandmother, who's sick. She asked for my number, which I gave to her (entered it in my phone herself), and she also asked if I'd like to hang out sometime - go to a movie or something. Care to guess what I said?
If you said 'yes', you are correct. I think that about covers everything. Oh, and at one point (like I said, my memory of the event is fairly fuzzy, and growing more so), she asked, and I quote, 'Can I have a hug?' It felt good. The hug, I mean. Mindy and I clicked. We really did. Granted, our relationship (most of the second half, I think) was marked by a large number of tribulations, but I have a large number of good memories of her. I don't remember much of the fighting, but I do remember the hugs, and the kisses, and the looks of joy and happiness. The feeling of warmth, of love. I just don't know. Heather says I have some decisions to make, and I guess I do. If she ever calls me back, that is. I gave her my number, but failed to ask for hers.
I hope she doesn't construe that as a lack of interest. I was really tired from the 15 hours or so I'd worked, the lack of sleep, and was also in something akin to a low-level state of shock. I really didn't know what to say. I mean, I'm all for resuming contact with her. I'm probably close to her as anyone, save Rose and Jarrod. Being closer to someone you haven't seen in a few years than any current years is... odd. The weird thoughts come when I remember one small fact about Mindy and I. We got back together 8 times. To the best of my recollection, we weren't able to spend more than a little time in each other's company without ending up back together, or well on the way.
So I'm not sure how I feel about this whole situation. Except for one thing - I keep hoping she'll call, and we'll got out and spend some time together. Even if it's just talking, catching up on the past few years. Hypothetically speaking, if things were given the chance of progressing further and it was solely up to me... I just don't know. Things have been so weird lately, I've felt adrift in a lot of ways. My perosnal life has been.. odd. Take Suzie, for example. Don't get me wrong, she's a sweet girl. But that's a situation I *never* should have wandered into. If I had been thinking clearer, hadn't been going through such social withdrawal and lonliness, probably would have escaped the whole thing altogether. I'll probably just handle the situation like I do DM'ing a session - deal with it as it comes up. So we'll see.
I was *really* weirded out after that, but strangely exhilerated. So I did the next thing that came to my mind after going in. I called Lilie. We talked for about half an hour. Topics varied. Nothing terribly heavy, but it wasn't all just light-hearted fluff either. Definitely the longest phone conversation I've had with a girl (not counting Rose) in a while. Eventually, though, I told her I had to go, which I did, because I had to shower and do some stuff. Nothing else really of note on Sunday - studying for tests, homework, that kind of thing.
So then came Monday. Which makes sense, I guess. Anyway. Found out the DDR machine was broken Monday morning. It broke my heart. Well, not really, but it was annoying. I was really tired all day and fell asleep in CS. I think the two are related. Took a probability test, which went very well. I got everything right, except two things. First, I misunderstood one question, so I answered it the wrong way. I did right the correct answer down as an aside, so he may give me partial credit or something. That mistake, I can live with. The second is much more annoying: I didn't even see the fourth page. Seriously. Which is endlessly annoying. Luckily, there was only one problem on that page, and an easy one at that, but it really, really annoys me. I would have gotten it completely right, but instead, I'll get no credit for that.
Monday night, went over to Matt and Luke's for D&D. We decided to restart the campaign, so they started building new characters. I'm trying something new - no PrCs, fairly strict die rolling, stuff like that. Consider it an experiement. We'll see how it turns out. They seemed to resist it at first, but I think they'll accept it. Or not. They can always have someone else DM.
Tuesday was my first shift as assistant manager. It went okay. The new shirt didn't prove much of a hindrance, though we'll see how it does in the kitchen tomorrow. (Side note: "Send Me an Angel" just came up on Winamp.) It wasn't that different from what I've been doing, which gives me some encouragement. I definitely didn't have any problems with the crew. I did the deposit and what-not, and that took a while, since Javi had to walk me through it. I counted down the carhops, and two of them were 7 and 12 dollars short. I *hate* it when I have to tell a carhop they're short. It makes me feel really bad, and it's the main issue I have with the job.
I got home about 7 or so, and had chem homework due at 8 - with a 2 hour grace period. So, of course, Lilie calls. Which was really, really cool. That doesn't happen that often. We talked a little, and I invited her to fifty cent night at Showplace. Nothing terribly great was showing, so we went to see the Bourne Supremacy. Next week, Spider-Man 2 and the Village is showing, so I'll end up going to see at least one of them, if not both. Anyway. We went in, and sat down. We both had our feet up on the seats in front of us, and talked a little more. Some girls came and sat down in front of us (there were plenty of empty seats, but they choose the ones in front of us; how annoying). So we had to take our feet down. I actually had mine resting on the arm rest; the girl to the left said it was okay, that it didn't bother her, and I could keep it. She then turned and said that she reocgnized me, and correctly identified me as someone that plays DDR on campus all the time. Apparently, she works at one of the nearby businesses, and sees me all the time. Or something like that. But Lilie couldn't really see over them, so we moved back a row. And put our feet back up on the chairs. We talked a lot, which is cool - I've always been a talker during movies (I got 'shushed' during Catwoman. Seriously.) She did lay her head down on my arm for most of the last third or so, and I kind of lay my head down on hers. Or something like that. I even ventured far enough to play with her hair. A little. Very little. Anyway. After the movie, we loitered in front of the theater for a while (well, we sat in the theater for quite a while after the movie ended, probably twenty minutes or so), talking. Eventualy, we walked to her car, she left, and I went back to my truck and left as well. She might make it Thursday, but might have to work. Friday is anybody's guess - I don't think anybody's going to be there playing, so I don't know. I think we're both off, though.
I'm not sure about us. I think she knows I like her, but first off, I don't know how she feels, and she's never really voluntereed any information on the matter. Maybe I'm supposed to drag it out of her? I've never really known what to do in these situations. Rudy would say this is my chance to avoid being dragged down into the friend zone, if I'm going to do so. I don't think she's dropped any hints or anything, but I'd be the last person to know if she did, so I'm probably not a reliable source of information on that front. We'll see.
I was fairly tired, between the back-to-back 8 - 5 shifts, with the non-stop frenzy of school, work, and DDR I've been doing the past two months or so. I pulled up to my street, and noticed in dismay that all of the convenient parking spots were taken. I initially elected to just park right in front of my driveway. I pulled up behind Jerry's truck, when a green truck pulled up right next to me. There were two girls sitting in the cab, waving at me. I didn't hear if they were saying anything; Paul Oakenfield's 'Send Me An Angel' was playing fairly loud. I paused the music, and the driver asked me a simple question - 'Do you recognize me?' 'No.' 'It's me, Mindy.'
I'm going to repeat that, as it bears repeating. 'It's me, Mindy.'
She then went to park so we could talk in slightly more convenient circumstances. I parked across the street, and tried to compile my thoughts and regain my composure while she walked from her truck to mine. I had NO IDEA what to say - this was Mindy. I haven't seen or talked to her in, um, three years? I was fairly certain she wanted nothing more to do with me. So she walks up to my truck - I'm still sitting in the driver's seat. I still can't get over how much she's changed. She was wearing a bikini type thing (I think, she's becoming a little fuzzy - my visual memory was never very strong, especially when it comes to describing people); she's dropped some weight. She was never very big, but she was... not quite thick, but almost. Solid. She's definitely 'thin' now. She's also aged a lot. Well, I guess that's to be expected. The last time I saw her (before this), she was... 14? 15? She's 18 now - that's a major bit of growing up, especially for girls. So both of those combined, she looks *way* different. She was always attractive, but now, even much more so.
We talked a little bit. She asked me what I'd been up, and I told her. 'Nothing.' Seriously, what have I been up to? Nothing. Told her I was at SWT now; still at Sonic, finally an assistant manager. She also asked me if I was seeing anyone, and I briefly mentioned Suzie, but that other than her, there hadn't been anyone else. She told me she saw a 35 year old for a while (2 years) (I guess that's who Rose saw her with that one time in IHOP), but no one else really other than that. She's going to UTSA, studying psychology (I forgot if that was her major or minor, and what the other one was), working full time in San Antonio. She was living in San Antonio, but she's living her right now to help take care of her grandmother, who's sick. She asked for my number, which I gave to her (entered it in my phone herself), and she also asked if I'd like to hang out sometime - go to a movie or something. Care to guess what I said?
If you said 'yes', you are correct. I think that about covers everything. Oh, and at one point (like I said, my memory of the event is fairly fuzzy, and growing more so), she asked, and I quote, 'Can I have a hug?' It felt good. The hug, I mean. Mindy and I clicked. We really did. Granted, our relationship (most of the second half, I think) was marked by a large number of tribulations, but I have a large number of good memories of her. I don't remember much of the fighting, but I do remember the hugs, and the kisses, and the looks of joy and happiness. The feeling of warmth, of love. I just don't know. Heather says I have some decisions to make, and I guess I do. If she ever calls me back, that is. I gave her my number, but failed to ask for hers.
I hope she doesn't construe that as a lack of interest. I was really tired from the 15 hours or so I'd worked, the lack of sleep, and was also in something akin to a low-level state of shock. I really didn't know what to say. I mean, I'm all for resuming contact with her. I'm probably close to her as anyone, save Rose and Jarrod. Being closer to someone you haven't seen in a few years than any current years is... odd. The weird thoughts come when I remember one small fact about Mindy and I. We got back together 8 times. To the best of my recollection, we weren't able to spend more than a little time in each other's company without ending up back together, or well on the way.
So I'm not sure how I feel about this whole situation. Except for one thing - I keep hoping she'll call, and we'll got out and spend some time together. Even if it's just talking, catching up on the past few years. Hypothetically speaking, if things were given the chance of progressing further and it was solely up to me... I just don't know. Things have been so weird lately, I've felt adrift in a lot of ways. My perosnal life has been.. odd. Take Suzie, for example. Don't get me wrong, she's a sweet girl. But that's a situation I *never* should have wandered into. If I had been thinking clearer, hadn't been going through such social withdrawal and lonliness, probably would have escaped the whole thing altogether. I'll probably just handle the situation like I do DM'ing a session - deal with it as it comes up. So we'll see.
I was *really* weirded out after that, but strangely exhilerated. So I did the next thing that came to my mind after going in. I called Lilie. We talked for about half an hour. Topics varied. Nothing terribly heavy, but it wasn't all just light-hearted fluff either. Definitely the longest phone conversation I've had with a girl (not counting Rose) in a while. Eventually, though, I told her I had to go, which I did, because I had to shower and do some stuff. Nothing else really of note on Sunday - studying for tests, homework, that kind of thing.
So then came Monday. Which makes sense, I guess. Anyway. Found out the DDR machine was broken Monday morning. It broke my heart. Well, not really, but it was annoying. I was really tired all day and fell asleep in CS. I think the two are related. Took a probability test, which went very well. I got everything right, except two things. First, I misunderstood one question, so I answered it the wrong way. I did right the correct answer down as an aside, so he may give me partial credit or something. That mistake, I can live with. The second is much more annoying: I didn't even see the fourth page. Seriously. Which is endlessly annoying. Luckily, there was only one problem on that page, and an easy one at that, but it really, really annoys me. I would have gotten it completely right, but instead, I'll get no credit for that.
Monday night, went over to Matt and Luke's for D&D. We decided to restart the campaign, so they started building new characters. I'm trying something new - no PrCs, fairly strict die rolling, stuff like that. Consider it an experiement. We'll see how it turns out. They seemed to resist it at first, but I think they'll accept it. Or not. They can always have someone else DM.
Tuesday was my first shift as assistant manager. It went okay. The new shirt didn't prove much of a hindrance, though we'll see how it does in the kitchen tomorrow. (Side note: "Send Me an Angel" just came up on Winamp.) It wasn't that different from what I've been doing, which gives me some encouragement. I definitely didn't have any problems with the crew. I did the deposit and what-not, and that took a while, since Javi had to walk me through it. I counted down the carhops, and two of them were 7 and 12 dollars short. I *hate* it when I have to tell a carhop they're short. It makes me feel really bad, and it's the main issue I have with the job.
I got home about 7 or so, and had chem homework due at 8 - with a 2 hour grace period. So, of course, Lilie calls. Which was really, really cool. That doesn't happen that often. We talked a little, and I invited her to fifty cent night at Showplace. Nothing terribly great was showing, so we went to see the Bourne Supremacy. Next week, Spider-Man 2 and the Village is showing, so I'll end up going to see at least one of them, if not both. Anyway. We went in, and sat down. We both had our feet up on the seats in front of us, and talked a little more. Some girls came and sat down in front of us (there were plenty of empty seats, but they choose the ones in front of us; how annoying). So we had to take our feet down. I actually had mine resting on the arm rest; the girl to the left said it was okay, that it didn't bother her, and I could keep it. She then turned and said that she reocgnized me, and correctly identified me as someone that plays DDR on campus all the time. Apparently, she works at one of the nearby businesses, and sees me all the time. Or something like that. But Lilie couldn't really see over them, so we moved back a row. And put our feet back up on the chairs. We talked a lot, which is cool - I've always been a talker during movies (I got 'shushed' during Catwoman. Seriously.) She did lay her head down on my arm for most of the last third or so, and I kind of lay my head down on hers. Or something like that. I even ventured far enough to play with her hair. A little. Very little. Anyway. After the movie, we loitered in front of the theater for a while (well, we sat in the theater for quite a while after the movie ended, probably twenty minutes or so), talking. Eventualy, we walked to her car, she left, and I went back to my truck and left as well. She might make it Thursday, but might have to work. Friday is anybody's guess - I don't think anybody's going to be there playing, so I don't know. I think we're both off, though.
I'm not sure about us. I think she knows I like her, but first off, I don't know how she feels, and she's never really voluntereed any information on the matter. Maybe I'm supposed to drag it out of her? I've never really known what to do in these situations. Rudy would say this is my chance to avoid being dragged down into the friend zone, if I'm going to do so. I don't think she's dropped any hints or anything, but I'd be the last person to know if she did, so I'm probably not a reliable source of information on that front. We'll see.
Fly on the Wings of Love - XTM ft. Annia
Fly on the wings of love
fly baby fly
reaching the stars above
touching the sky
In the summer night
when the moon shines bright
feeling young forever
and the heat is on
when the day lights gone
still happy together
There is one more thing I'd like to add
she's the greatest love I ever heard
fly on the wings of love
fly baby fly
reaching the stars above
touching the sky
and the suns go by
and there's a lot to try
andIi'm feeling lucky, whoo yeah
in the sun to sand
she's got me hand in hand
love is all around me
there is one more thing I'd like to add
she's the greatest love i ever heard
fly on the wings of love
fly baby fly
reaching the stars above
touching the sky
baby it is mine
fly on the wings of love
reaching the stars above
touching the sky.
fly baby fly
reaching the stars above
touching the sky
In the summer night
when the moon shines bright
feeling young forever
and the heat is on
when the day lights gone
still happy together
There is one more thing I'd like to add
she's the greatest love I ever heard
fly on the wings of love
fly baby fly
reaching the stars above
touching the sky
and the suns go by
and there's a lot to try
andIi'm feeling lucky, whoo yeah
in the sun to sand
she's got me hand in hand
love is all around me
there is one more thing I'd like to add
she's the greatest love i ever heard
fly on the wings of love
fly baby fly
reaching the stars above
touching the sky
baby it is mine
fly on the wings of love
reaching the stars above
touching the sky.
Tic-toc, you've got the spot; Here I come, ready or not
Yeah, things are going well right now. I'm having trouble sitting still in class - that well. DDR machine's fixed, and played a little during lunch. (I refer to my half hour break between Intro to Fine Arts and Computer Science as lunch). Went to a movie with Lilie last night; that was fun. I'm going to seriously annoy my CS teacher and be a complete smart-ass with the next program, and I'm going to love every minute of it.
Had my first shift as an assistant manager yesterday. It went fairly well. It wasn't *that* much different from what I've already been doing. The crew responded fairly well; didn't have any authority problem. There's a few reasons for that, and I'll be going into that later in my next post. Right now, I'm in between CS and Probability; that's usually a fifteen minute break, but today, it's like twenty minutes or so. Again, I'll go into that in my next post.
My last substantial post was Saturday morning, so I have a fair bit of catching up to do. I'll start now, and see how far I get.
Saturday was okay. Worked 8 - 5. I was really tired after that, so I came home and crashed for a while, then played SO3 until it was time for work Sunday; again, 8 - 5. That shift *sucked* - it was Frank and I in the kitchen (the last shift where George wasn't replaced); Javi was managing, so he spent most of the shift in the kitchen as well (when he wasn't in the back watching the football game, that is). Rudy opened, so he stayed around until 2 or so and helped us out as well. So things didn't go that bad, but they could have gone a lot better. I don't like Frank. He's an okay guy, but I really, really don't like new cooks. Especially ones that suck.
Sunday after work is when things started happening, but since it's time for me to go to Probability, I'll talk about that later. Probably much later, since I'll probably go play some more DDR after class, then find something to do this evening.
Oh yeah, we also started our D&D campaign over. But again, that's another story, for another post.
Had my first shift as an assistant manager yesterday. It went fairly well. It wasn't *that* much different from what I've already been doing. The crew responded fairly well; didn't have any authority problem. There's a few reasons for that, and I'll be going into that later in my next post. Right now, I'm in between CS and Probability; that's usually a fifteen minute break, but today, it's like twenty minutes or so. Again, I'll go into that in my next post.
My last substantial post was Saturday morning, so I have a fair bit of catching up to do. I'll start now, and see how far I get.
Saturday was okay. Worked 8 - 5. I was really tired after that, so I came home and crashed for a while, then played SO3 until it was time for work Sunday; again, 8 - 5. That shift *sucked* - it was Frank and I in the kitchen (the last shift where George wasn't replaced); Javi was managing, so he spent most of the shift in the kitchen as well (when he wasn't in the back watching the football game, that is). Rudy opened, so he stayed around until 2 or so and helped us out as well. So things didn't go that bad, but they could have gone a lot better. I don't like Frank. He's an okay guy, but I really, really don't like new cooks. Especially ones that suck.
Sunday after work is when things started happening, but since it's time for me to go to Probability, I'll talk about that later. Probably much later, since I'll probably go play some more DDR after class, then find something to do this evening.
Oh yeah, we also started our D&D campaign over. But again, that's another story, for another post.
2004-10-05
Everything's so wrong and I don't belong, living in your precious memories
Wow. I have a date (sort of; I don't know if that's an entirely accurate description, but I like saying it, so I'm going to) with Lilie in about half an hour. We're going to see the Bourne Supremacy. Neither of us have seen the Bourne Identity, but I think we'll make it through it. Or something like that.
2004-10-04
I believed in you; must have been a fool
I want a shoe phone. Really. I was just walking here, and the thought popped into my head. Just think about how cool that wolld be - you're walking around with your friends, and your shoe starts ringing, and you say "That's me." Then you pick up your shoe and start talking to it. Then, when people don't believe you, you let them talk on it too. Seriously.
The DDR machine is broken right now. The coin feed mechanism isn't working. I don't know how to handle this. I'm confident it'll be fixed by Wednesday, but that doesn't help me today.
I think I'm going to start keeping a sleep log, just for my own information, and possibly others. Just track how much I sleep per day, so I can look back and see. It'll be interesting.
The DDR machine is broken right now. The coin feed mechanism isn't working. I don't know how to handle this. I'm confident it'll be fixed by Wednesday, but that doesn't help me today.
I think I'm going to start keeping a sleep log, just for my own information, and possibly others. Just track how much I sleep per day, so I can look back and see. It'll be interesting.
Like a shooting star across the midnight sky; Whereever you are, you're gonna see me fly
When it rains, it pours.
And I'm in the middle of a flash flood.
So I've been talking to Lilie lately; I'm definitely interested, and all experts I've consulted on the matter agree that there's a good chance of reciprocal interest (well, except one - her. Not that she disagrees; I just have solicited her opinion yet).
Then Suzie IMs me an hour or so ago, and talks to me about some weird stuff Caleb said to her.
But weirdest of all, MINDY HOCH talked to me earlier. I'll give a more in-depth explanation earlier, but suffice to say, that's something that I didn't think was going to happen again. It's WEIRD.
And I'm in the middle of a flash flood.
So I've been talking to Lilie lately; I'm definitely interested, and all experts I've consulted on the matter agree that there's a good chance of reciprocal interest (well, except one - her. Not that she disagrees; I just have solicited her opinion yet).
Then Suzie IMs me an hour or so ago, and talks to me about some weird stuff Caleb said to her.
But weirdest of all, MINDY HOCH talked to me earlier. I'll give a more in-depth explanation earlier, but suffice to say, that's something that I didn't think was going to happen again. It's WEIRD.
2004-10-02
Oceans apart, I'm still thinking of you; Tears in my heart, all my dreams are torn in two
Had some fun earlier. Jarrod called and invited me to go play Laser Tag with him at Blazer Tag with Michael, Myca, Steve/Drew, and a few other friends of theirs. He picked me up, we drove up, and well, played Laser Tag. First, though, I showed off some DDR moves. The problem, though, was that the right arrow on the left pad was messed up, so I didn't well until my second game. Did fair there, and everyone was suitable impressed. Then, the actual game of Laser Tag. It was fun. They got new vests and guns, which had better sensors. They're a little smaller, though - I looked kind of funny, but Jarrod diplomatically said that I looked like the uber-macho guy in the games that's too big for the uniform. Or something like that.
Jarrod, Michael, and I were all on red team, so we took the tower and held it the whole game. By the end, the majority of the red team - at least six or seven people - were on the tower with us. We were having a blast - covering each other, calling out where people were, that kind of thing. I moved around a little more and had a shoot-out with some blues, and the whole time we kept having sniper duels with a clump of greens that had holed up in the tower opposite us.
Our team won over green by a narrow margin, but over blue by a substantial one. Jarrod took 2nd, I had 7th, and Michael had 6th. I think. Something like that.
They also had the D&D arcade game, and we spent some time playing that. It was a lot of mindless fun.
Moving back... class Friday was okay, if somewhat nondescript. Played a little DDR (only 5 or 6 games, of least half of which were on standard, though on Hidden). I guess that's as close as I come to 'No DDR'. My legs hurt like hell! To compound everything, I work 8 - 5 both Saturday and Sunday. So that'll be fun. I'm about to eat a banana, which Steve said would help (and it does, if I remember correctly) and stretch out more.
So, about Lilie and Thursday night, which is what I know you've all been waiting for (no, I don't know who I'm talking to or addressing.) Actually, I'm going to go eat that banana first.
It's half an hour later, and I'm back. That was a good banana.
So, after Lilie asked me about what had happened, there was a definite shift in her behavior (I mean, at work on Thursday). The only way I can think to phrase it is that she touched me more often. On the back, mainly, and I think once on the arm. That, and I think she noticed me more. Or at all. Or something like that. I was also in a great mood the rest of the shift as well - 'til she left, of course. I kept breaking out into little giggle fits, which really, really confused Ray. Confused me too.
That trend definitely carried on at Dragon's Lair. She rubbed me on the back a few times, patted my arm, and I think rubbed me on the head once (though I may be making that up). Luke made a comment about it as we were doing some post-game analysis later that night, that she seemed somwhat flirtatious towards me, somewhat open, and interested. Possibly. Now, this is a weird situation I find myself in. It's hard for me to vocalize, so bear with me (who am I talking to?)
I did say I liked Lilie, but that was a reaction to just seeing her that one time when she came in street clothes before I met her. So it's not like with Katie, where I have a huge crush on them. I don't think I've set myself up to take a big fall and get hurt. Kristen might have put me in that situation; I'm not sure. I don't know how she feels, though, which will certainly have a large impact on the whole thing. We'll see what happens.
Two other weird things: First, we were playing History of the World. I was in dead last, and about five points behind Lilie. In continuing with the mood of the evening, I made a comment about having a grand view of her ass, and being able to see nothing else. This elicited laughter from Matt and Luke, and she said, "Is it nice?" I was like, "Um, I don't know?" She then said something to the effect that I should, since I've looked at her at work, and should have checked out her ass by now (or something like that).
Secondly, (still playing History of the World), I did something weird (I don't remember the specifics), and it somehow led to Luke making the comment, "I keep waiting for you to show up at my house and be mature." Or something like that. I said "You're going to be waiting a long time." (Or something like that). Then Lilie says, "Just wait until February." I'm *so* confused - what happens in February? Does she have some sort of 4 1/2 - 5 month delayed plan or something? I emailed her asking about it, but she hasn't responded yet, nor have I seen her on AIM. That's not teribly surprising, thoug, since I check my email approximately eight billion times a day and forget that other people don't. The same holds true for AIM (basically), and she's on dial-up right now (Oh, the pain), so there's not a constant broadband to be on IM with.
Jarrod, Michael, and I were all on red team, so we took the tower and held it the whole game. By the end, the majority of the red team - at least six or seven people - were on the tower with us. We were having a blast - covering each other, calling out where people were, that kind of thing. I moved around a little more and had a shoot-out with some blues, and the whole time we kept having sniper duels with a clump of greens that had holed up in the tower opposite us.
Our team won over green by a narrow margin, but over blue by a substantial one. Jarrod took 2nd, I had 7th, and Michael had 6th. I think. Something like that.
They also had the D&D arcade game, and we spent some time playing that. It was a lot of mindless fun.
Moving back... class Friday was okay, if somewhat nondescript. Played a little DDR (only 5 or 6 games, of least half of which were on standard, though on Hidden). I guess that's as close as I come to 'No DDR'. My legs hurt like hell! To compound everything, I work 8 - 5 both Saturday and Sunday. So that'll be fun. I'm about to eat a banana, which Steve said would help (and it does, if I remember correctly) and stretch out more.
So, about Lilie and Thursday night, which is what I know you've all been waiting for (no, I don't know who I'm talking to or addressing.) Actually, I'm going to go eat that banana first.
It's half an hour later, and I'm back. That was a good banana.
So, after Lilie asked me about what had happened, there was a definite shift in her behavior (I mean, at work on Thursday). The only way I can think to phrase it is that she touched me more often. On the back, mainly, and I think once on the arm. That, and I think she noticed me more. Or at all. Or something like that. I was also in a great mood the rest of the shift as well - 'til she left, of course. I kept breaking out into little giggle fits, which really, really confused Ray. Confused me too.
That trend definitely carried on at Dragon's Lair. She rubbed me on the back a few times, patted my arm, and I think rubbed me on the head once (though I may be making that up). Luke made a comment about it as we were doing some post-game analysis later that night, that she seemed somwhat flirtatious towards me, somewhat open, and interested. Possibly. Now, this is a weird situation I find myself in. It's hard for me to vocalize, so bear with me (who am I talking to?)
I did say I liked Lilie, but that was a reaction to just seeing her that one time when she came in street clothes before I met her. So it's not like with Katie, where I have a huge crush on them. I don't think I've set myself up to take a big fall and get hurt. Kristen might have put me in that situation; I'm not sure. I don't know how she feels, though, which will certainly have a large impact on the whole thing. We'll see what happens.
Two other weird things: First, we were playing History of the World. I was in dead last, and about five points behind Lilie. In continuing with the mood of the evening, I made a comment about having a grand view of her ass, and being able to see nothing else. This elicited laughter from Matt and Luke, and she said, "Is it nice?" I was like, "Um, I don't know?" She then said something to the effect that I should, since I've looked at her at work, and should have checked out her ass by now (or something like that).
Secondly, (still playing History of the World), I did something weird (I don't remember the specifics), and it somehow led to Luke making the comment, "I keep waiting for you to show up at my house and be mature." Or something like that. I said "You're going to be waiting a long time." (Or something like that). Then Lilie says, "Just wait until February." I'm *so* confused - what happens in February? Does she have some sort of 4 1/2 - 5 month delayed plan or something? I emailed her asking about it, but she hasn't responded yet, nor have I seen her on AIM. That's not teribly surprising, thoug, since I check my email approximately eight billion times a day and forget that other people don't. The same holds true for AIM (basically), and she's on dial-up right now (Oh, the pain), so there's not a constant broadband to be on IM with.
2004-10-01
Almost drowning in a sea of sin; Can you ease the pain I feel within?
Worked 12 - 6 today. It wasn't fun. Dave was in the kitchen today, because George was fired, was supposed to work today, and didn't replace his shift today. I don't know if that's from lack of effort or lack of personnal, but either way, it means I had to deal with Dave in the kitchen again today. I got stuck on grill acting as his personal bitch, while Ray got to hang out on swamp. He repeatedly yelled at the fountains for various things, but he finally left. Things went much better after that. It was just Ray and me in the kitchen; Lilie, Allison, and Dora (later Lacey) in the fountain, and Kenny, Ashley, Chelsea, and Shelly carhopping. I enjoyed the crew, for the most part. Shelly is *very* sarcastic, and a lot of fun to work with. So far. Ray left me alone in the kitchen about 4 and went to do manager stuff, and I had to cook by myself for an hour or so. It got really busy at one point, but I managed to hold it down until Scott showed up at 5. Brian was half an hour late, and Thomas came in as well, so I got to leave fairly quickly after that, even though everything wasn't done.
One very interesting thing did happen, though. Lilie came up to me and asked me to confirm something "a little birdy" had told her - that someone, she wasn't sure who but would guess Kristen, had tried to hook us up. I confirmed it for her; she asked why. I told her the short version - "Because she thought we'd make a good couple" and that the long version was, well, long. She asked me for it, and I told her I'd be happy to tell her, just not now, since we were both working. Earlier, I had asked her about Dragon's Lair; somehow, it ended up that she'd stop by sometime tonight to get the long story.
And damn it, she did.
Crazy, I know.
I got there a little before 7 and headed down to the open gaming room. There was a five player Magic game going on (containing Josh, Derrick, and Brett); Luke and some other guy (named Matt) were also chilling. The three of us ended up playing Settlers of Catan. A weird little chime sounds each time the door opens, so every time it did, I jumped up, ran over to the door, and looked out to see if it was Lilie. Eventually, it was. She came down to the cave and sat down next to me and watched us play Settlers of Catan. She picked up the game by the time we were done (I won!), and I managed to explain to her parts of the what had happened. We deliberated as to what we would do next, and we ended up playing a four player game of History of the World. During the setup, and while they were sorting out armies, I explained to her the whole history with Kristen and I, and why Kristen would try to hook us up in the first place. She also asked why Allison thought I liked her, and I told her about the day she came in in street clothes for a second, before I knew her, and after seeing her, said that I loved that girl (that being her, of course). That was just a reaction to her physical appearance, of course. I somehow ended up winning History of the World, as well.
By that time, it was almost closing, so we left. Lilie and I sat out in the parking lot for a while and talked, then we went home. She works 10 - 5 tomorrow, and I have class 10 - 3.
There's a lot more to talk about - impressions, notable things that happened, interpretations, that kind of thing, but I want to play some Star Ocean 3. I'll do that later.
One very interesting thing did happen, though. Lilie came up to me and asked me to confirm something "a little birdy" had told her - that someone, she wasn't sure who but would guess Kristen, had tried to hook us up. I confirmed it for her; she asked why. I told her the short version - "Because she thought we'd make a good couple" and that the long version was, well, long. She asked me for it, and I told her I'd be happy to tell her, just not now, since we were both working. Earlier, I had asked her about Dragon's Lair; somehow, it ended up that she'd stop by sometime tonight to get the long story.
And damn it, she did.
Crazy, I know.
I got there a little before 7 and headed down to the open gaming room. There was a five player Magic game going on (containing Josh, Derrick, and Brett); Luke and some other guy (named Matt) were also chilling. The three of us ended up playing Settlers of Catan. A weird little chime sounds each time the door opens, so every time it did, I jumped up, ran over to the door, and looked out to see if it was Lilie. Eventually, it was. She came down to the cave and sat down next to me and watched us play Settlers of Catan. She picked up the game by the time we were done (I won!), and I managed to explain to her parts of the what had happened. We deliberated as to what we would do next, and we ended up playing a four player game of History of the World. During the setup, and while they were sorting out armies, I explained to her the whole history with Kristen and I, and why Kristen would try to hook us up in the first place. She also asked why Allison thought I liked her, and I told her about the day she came in in street clothes for a second, before I knew her, and after seeing her, said that I loved that girl (that being her, of course). That was just a reaction to her physical appearance, of course. I somehow ended up winning History of the World, as well.
By that time, it was almost closing, so we left. Lilie and I sat out in the parking lot for a while and talked, then we went home. She works 10 - 5 tomorrow, and I have class 10 - 3.
There's a lot more to talk about - impressions, notable things that happened, interpretations, that kind of thing, but I want to play some Star Ocean 3. I'll do that later.
