Woah. That rocked. Man, that was awesome. Let's see, let's start with a basic summary:

• First, I woke up about eight o'clock and commenced final preparations - cleaned my room, did dishes and laundry, and got my hair cut.


• After that, I went to get Zara. I called her cell three times - before leaving, when I was half-way there, and when I arrived on campus. No answer. I had Janelle go through the UT directory to get her home phone number, which I then called and woke her up. She was down in about ten minutes.


• We drove back to San Marcos.


• Josh and Jarrod showed up, and we left.


• Everything went great until Ben White & 35, when we hit traffic. And by 'hit', I mean like a fly hits a semi going 72 mph. Except we didn't die.


• Half an hour later, we get past the Ben White/35 exit, and get to Blazer Tag three minutes after that.


• Christine and Devon aren't there, and won't be seen all day. Brian is, though, and we proceed to play a game of Tag - we lost our first game since we weren't there.


• That was way too fun. Jarrod (who grabbed the wrong pack, and ended up on my team) and I pulled some cool commando stuff and re-took the tower from like multiple green people. Zara used the handle "Zarmander", which is ineffibly cute. The red team won.


• We drove back to my house. Zara, Brian and I stopped at campus, and Zara called her play person, who told her she couldn't be any later than 7:30; Zara came for dinner (yay!!)


• We came home; Caleb was there as well; we began a game of nuclear Risk, and got through three (people's) turns before dinner started.


• Everyone loved dinner. It was awesome.


• I had to take Zara and Freddie home and to work, respectively.


• Zara and I talked the whole way back. It was really cool.


• I finally got home, and we had strawberry shortcake, then started playing 4-player Super Smash Bros.


• Eventually, we went back to Blazer Tag and played another game. We were all on one team, and held the tower.


• I discovered DDR.

That's about it. It was really, really fun.

Two things:
First: I need to back off in regards to Zara. Wait, that sounds wrong. What I mean is, I need to quit minutely analyzing every single moment. It's frustrating to realize this, because I've gotten so good at this sort of thing. Backing out of arguments when I realize they're degenerating into little fits and aren't going anywhere; backing away when I realize I want to be someone's friend way more than they want to be mine. I guess that'll make this that much easier. I'm still "going for it", if that makes any sense.

Second: DDR rules. I don't think I should be any good at it, as I'm a big, uncoordinated white guy. But I was thinking about it, and I actually have a couple of advantages that help. I was in band, and darn good at it too, so I can follow beats and rythyms pretty well. I just never knew what to do (like when dancing, for example.) They give you the arrows, which takes care of that. Second, I'm ambidextrous, so I can use both feet really well. Next time the Knighthood goes to Einstein's, I might just play with them (except I get hella-sweaty.)

It was cool, too, because everyone agreed me with that Zara's really pretty. Apparently, they had this weird impression she was tall and not-pretty.

So I'm IM'ing with Zara. She tells me she's in this play at eight tomorrow, but she has to be there at five. Major bummerage!!! Not only will she not be able to come back to San Marcos for an awesome cena italiana, but I can't even go watch her in the play. Man, that sucks. Oh well... Just took an m343K test. Looking foward to the weekend, except I might have to work for an hour tonight, making it difficult/impossible to head over to Josh's tonight, and I have to work 12-10 Sunday. Bruce said he'd pick up the tail end of that, though, if I wanted. I don't know. But no, it's not okay!! I was really looking foward to having her meet my friends and family, so maybe she'd realize I'm not just a big dork, but a big dork with a nice family. That sounds weird, for some reason. Oh well... I was going through the logs of all my IM friends, because I do stupid things like that when I'm bored, and I realized that when her and I first started talking, I told her about my little Tiffany-crush from waaaaaaaaaay back when. Man, I feel stupid. I mean, that whole Tiffany-crush-thing was stupid enough, but to end it with something this stupid is just vintage Binky.

Oh well...

Almost Saturday. Saturday will be fun. So far, Zara, Jarrod, Josh, Brian, Christine, Devon and Kristina are all going to play Lazer Tag, and Caleb will be joining us after he gets off work for dinner. I still get to invite one more person, and I *love* those last minute things. But for some reason, I'm pretty good at pulling these off. Oh well. I just finished washing the outside of my truck. Exterior wash, wax, tire spray, and cleaned the windows. Mom asked me what's the big occasion. Well, to be honest, I'm really glad Zara feels comfortable enough around me to ride with me for half an hour together. Of course, she walked blindly into the Buh Mad-Dog party, so she could just be really brave. Either way, she's still really cute, and I can't wait for the oppurtunity to get to know her. I don't think I screwed up everything as badly as I did. I asked Tom during Ratings if there was anything between him and Zara, and he replied negatively. Additionally, Richard asked if I knew about Becky. I asked if that was in regards to Tom or Zara, but they wouldn't say. I'm guessing Tom. Which is AWEsome. And Zara and I talked on the AIM, so I guess everything's cool there. I don't know if she reads this (if I had to guess, I'd guess "No.") (and she's the only one who even might).

Ratings was really cool. The police came and made us stop, but ChaChee and Drew were telling me and Tom how they can't *make* us stop, only ask us to, as long as we don't break any laws (which we weren't).

Just got home from work (actually, it was over an hour ago). Yesterday was my 20^th birthday. It was interesting. I say that a lot. Um, Sunday night, (the night *before* my birthday), me and mom and Janelle and Bam/Greg and Jerry all went out to eat at Chili's. It was pretty good, and the wait staff sang happy birthday to me. Then yesterday, I went to school and work like a normal day. But Janelle and Caitlin (that's misspelled, but no one reads it anyway, so I guess it doesn't matter that much) showed up with a cake. It really made my day (and the rest of the crew's day, who also got to eat cake). Then, after eating my cake, I got to keep it too. I've always wanted to say that. I also made that painful realization. Those of you who have a bad habit of developing crushes on the *totally* wrong people know which one I'm talking about. The one where you realize, no matter how hard you might try to deny it, that it just wouldn't work out between you and your crush. Even if your dream came true, even if you got that one special evening together, it just wouldn't work out. I hate that part. I haven't really talked to Zara since the incident w/ Lisa at Dobie. Oh yeah, I guess I haven't actually talked about that one yet.

Well, basically, "David" mentioned to me that it was really obvious that I was crushen' on Zara. We asked Lisa if it was, and she said that things were never obvious to her (I also learned she's going out with Josh, which I didn't know). Moments later, Lisa said, and I quote (actually, I don't remember what she said. This is, at best, a paraphrase):
"What do you mean, Binky HAS A CRUSH ON ZARA?"
The parts in all caps she said REALLY LOUDLY.
It was... well, not quite embarrassing, but I wish she hadn't said it. Sometimes, I think that kind of made Zara really uncomfortable around me anymore; but I could just be imagining things.
Oh well...
I wonder what the deal between her and Tom is, anyhoo. I mean, it's not really any of my business, but that doesn't stop me from wondering.
I'm going now, because SNL w/ the Spice Girls is on Comedy Central.

We just got back from my 'Birthday' dinner. Yay. Let's see... Bambi gave me a T-Shirt that said on the back something like "Keep Austin Weird". That reminded me of Roy's avatar that says "Pave Austin". It was interesting. I explained some of the Knighthood's event to Bam, and she actually found some of them funny. When I told her Zara was in the Knighthood, she said, "Is she a wench?" I didn't really know how to respond. Then I had to drive by work, to lend Raul twenty bucks so he could buy some beer. Rachel was there, and she continued her constant "Give Will some totally mixed signs that really just make no sense, even more so then girls normally do (fail to make sense, that is)". Oh well... Payday is like tomorrow or Tuesday, so it's not a big deal. Tomorrow's the big day. I work from 5 to 11:30. Odd. But then the party's on Saturday. It should be... interesting. Zara will be there, which is another opurtunity to be a total doof. Kristina will be there, and I haven't seen her in a year or so, so that'll be good. I really don't know what to say. Apparently, putting ideas down in some sort of concrete form is not my strong suit.

Just got back from shopping (half an hour ago or so). Janelle (my little sister; we're both old enough now to really talk to each other - it's awesome!) and I went and saw the new Harry Potter movie at 10, then we went shopping at HEB. I'd sort of forgotten how much fun it is to go shopping at all hours of the morning, and I've now gotten to share that with my little sis. Anyhoo...

Today's subject: Am I mature?
The problem with this topic is that there's so many different ways to approach it. Let's start off by putting it in perspective. I'm 19, going to turn 20 in about 21 hours. So that puts me square in young adulthood, with full adulthood here or on its way quickly. I go to UT, and will be a junior next semster, and a senior at the beginning of next year. I still live at home, and commute from San Marcos to Austin every day. I think that's sufficient background. Now, onto the question. I mean, my taste in music is definitely immature. I still *love* pop. Britney Spears, Spice Girls, Kylie Minogue, I *love* it. I also enjoy some other stuff too - Stray Cats, Weird Al, techno, and some classic rock (Charlie Daniels). Most of my friends, or people I associate with, listen to *real* music. It's odd. Let's see... most of my friends are into pimping out their computers, hacking, that kind of thing. I don't really care. I've no real interest in drinking. Never have (had any alcohol enter my system, that is). So, I think it's safe to say that my personal tastes are definitely immature, relative to my age group. But why? Probably because of my relatively socially isolated life.

Then, there's emotionally. That's a much harder area to consider. I definitely have no problem with the gamut of human emotions - love, hate, jealousy, fear, etc. And I'm pretty sure I feel the right ones at the appropriate times. I may be comletely awkward around girls, but at least my heart is in the right place (I hope).

I also have no problem accepting responsibility for my actions. I think that ranks as very important when determining maturity. I can set aside personal desires to achieve a goal; momentarily reduce my sense of self to pass a tough situation. I think I'm mature in that sense.

But even so, it just doesn't feel like a resolution. I just don't feel that mature. I mean, I see people around me, and it seems like they're starting their actual lives, while I'm just some dinky kid. Perhaps part of it is just my apathy showing through, but it's still a major nagging.

Just checked out Zara's livejournal; she did end up going to RenFest this weekend, which is why she hasn't been online. Which is bad, because I miss her, and good, because it's hard to make a fool of yourself when she's not around.

Sitting at home. Just got off of work. Well, like forty minutes ago. Had to take another guy home, check my email, and put on some shorts. So now, I'm just sitting at home. Jarrod's not answering; he's who knows where; neither is Josh. It's pretty sad when you can totally have nothing to do on a Friday night when two people aren't answering their phones. It's pretty frustrating, because any other friends I could possibly have are in Austin - that whole UT thing. Zara, for instance. That makes it pretty difficult to form true friendships, as well as puts a strain on any that may form. I know, I know, it sounds like I'm whining. Maybe I am. What of it? I can deal with all of this social isolation. I do every day. But these are thoughts that go through my head every day, and it's not like there's anyone to share them with. So, I just retread the same mental paths over and over again. Writing these thoughts down does seem to stimulate thinking about them in different ways, or occasionally making me think of something new. Oh well... So, let's explore the Zara angle some more. Is this another latching on out of desperation? That thought's came up a few times, and I don't think so. I mean, I'll admit, there's been a few since coming to UT. Deidre definitely was. That girl in my philosophy class last semester was too. But I *knew* that for both of them the whole time. But I don't think so this time. I mean, it wasn't a right-away kind of thing. It was a month or two after meeting her for the first time (at a Knighthood meeting; where else?). I think it was at the Mad Dog party where it kind of came out, though. More tomorrow. Or the day after.

Yeah, so I just finished my diary, and my mom came home, and I have a new windshield. Go me, I suppose. And I've just made an idiot out myself yet again. Now, don't get me wrong, that's certainly nothing new to me. I'm really good at making a complete and total idiot out of myself (probably one of the key reasons the Knighthood will put up with me), but I haven't done it in a while (well, again, except for Knighthood type stuff). In reflection, though, that's only because I've been so isolated since joining college. It's kind of hard to make an idiot out of yourself when you're driving over an hour a day, spending another forty minutes on a bus, and spending the majority of the remainder in class or in San Marcos (where the cows don't care how you act). But now, that's changing. Now, I'm in the Knighthood, and finally managing to break out of this little isolation block I've built up. Then, there's Zara. Man, I've managed to screw things up completely in a relatively short amount of time. Usually, it takes me a little while. Not this time. But I'll thouroughly analyze that later, as I have to leave for work now. But I do have a forum for putting down all of this self-analyzation that I find myself doing, without fear of anyone actually *reading* it.

Well, it's been an interesting few days. My mom's been making sure I had to work Friday night, and repeatedly insisted that I take her car. Fair enough. But I'm sitting here at 4:00 Friday, hastily typing up an Italian diary to turn in before I go to work, when the doorbell rings. There were several gentlemen who informed me that they were here to replace my windshield. That's odd. I guess she's giving me a new windshield for my birthday. That's... totally bizarre. Sure, the old one has a major crack in it, but I think it's part of my truck's charm as an old truck. Oh well...

Yesterday, I went with the Knighthood to Dobie to eat as usual. I'd already eaten with a friend prior to the meeting beforehand, so I just sat around and watched everyone. Man, that was an odd day. I'll share some about that later.

I have no idea what's going on here. I'm only here 'cause this girl Zara told me to.

Quizzes

I personally like what Maddox has to say about online quizzes:

How is it that the people who answer online personality tests the most usually have the least personality? Not that taking online personality tests are a waste of time; they're right up there with slamming your dick in the door on the productivity scale. I don't know why these tests are becoming so popular lately. The questions are usually about your sexual preference, favorite foods (out of a list of 5, since there are clearly only 5 types of food in the universe and you must like one of them), questions about how many times you've cheated in a relationship, and several other arbitrary questions with no relevance to anything. Then based on your response, the quiz pigeon holes you into a category of a certain celebrity. Stupid. For example, there's a popular quiz called "Which Backstreet Boy are you?" News flash: you're not a Backstreet Boy. Posting the results of some stupid online journal isn't going to make you seem interesting or unique, it's going to make you look like a dumbass. Even if you match the personality of a Backstreet Boy, you're not a millionaire and probably never will be, so nobody cares. Congratulations, your personality isn't unique. I don't get it. It's like those people who go around with those t-shirts and stickers that say "you laugh at me because I'm different, but I laugh at you because you're all the same." How different are you if you're wearing a mass-produced t-shirt with a registered trade mark sold through one of the largest clothing franchises in the world? You're the reason Old Navy keeps making stupid commercials, and you're the reason McDonalds gets away with selling so much shitty food every day.

That being said...

I am 65% Geek.

Nerd, Freak, Geek, Dweeb. Sound familiar? That's okay, cause I will be the richest person at my 15th year high school reunion. If a "con" isn't happening that weekend.

Take the
Geek Test
@ FualiDotCom

I thought I'd score much higher.

Which Website are you?




What's Your D&D Alignment?

Based on your answers to the quiz, your most likely alignment is...

Neutral

A neutral character does what seems to be a good idea. She doesn’t feel strongly one way or the other when it comes to good vs. evil or law vs. chaos. Most neutrality is a lack of conviction or bias rather than a commitment to neutrality. Such a character thinks of good as better than evil. After all, she would rather have good neighbors and rulers than evil ones. Still, she’s not personally committed to upholding good in any abstract or universal way. Some neutral characters, on the other hand, commit themselves philosophically to neutrality. They see good, evil, law, and chaos as prejudices and dangerous extremes. They advocate the middle way of neutrality as the best, most balanced road in the long run. The common phrase for neutral is "true neutral." Neutral is the best alignment you can be because it means you act naturally, without prejudice or compulsion. --excerpted from the Player’s Handbook, Chapter 6

Heh. Not the Chaotic Good I'd usually ascribe to myself, but I was a little harsh on some of the answers. I might retake this one in a little while later, when I'm not in such a funk.

Which File Extension Are You?

Which File Extension are You?

Which Movie Super-Hero are You?

What Famous Leader Are You?

I was a little suprised at this one.


What Famous Leader Are You?
personality tests by similarminds.com

The Country Quiz

This one had a lot of odd questions, so I'm not sure about it.

You're Sudan!

Every time you get a headache, you reach for some aspirin, only to realize that someone destroyed it. That's just how things are going for you right now... it's hard to eat, hard to sleep, hard to not have a headache. You try to relax, but people always jump on you about something that doesn't make sense. If you were a goat, you'd be a Nubian.
Take the Country Quiz
at the Blue Pyramid

What's Your Blogging Personality?

This one didn't have pictures with the results.
I took the Blogging Personality Quiz at About Web logs and I am...

The Daily Grinder
I love blogging because it's like therapy. I can write about anything and everything that happens to me - from the food I ate to what I was doing when I heard the latest 'breaking news'. Being able to communicate with my friends (online and/or real life) through my blog is important to me.

The Inner Dragon Online Quiz

I am an Amethyst Dragon!

In the war between good and evil, a Amethyst Dragon tends to walk the fine line of Neutrality....


When it comes to the powers of Chaos vs. those of Law and Order, your inner dragon walks a fine line between Law and Chaos....
As far as magical tendancies, Magical spells come as natural to the Amethyst Dragon as breathe from it's body....


During combat situations, whether by spells or by claw, your inner dragon will do whatever it takes to get the job done....


The Amethyst Dragon makes its home in the deep caverns of the earth, often in mountainous regions. They spend much time in hibernation as one of their favorite things to do is to sleep.'


Formed from translucent amethyst, it is an awe inspiring sight to see one in it's true form. Light passes through the dragon's body creating a deep purple glow. It's scales will magnify the light rays into bright lavender beams to highlight this effect.'


Amethyst dragons spend most of their time homebound but do occasionally feel the need to take a sojourn to a far destination. These dragons love books and will often pick their destination from one of the many stories and histories they may have read. Amethyst dragons are very solitary in nature, but do keep a distant watch on the world around them. They tend to be highly intelligent, and often amuse themselves in human form by building gadgets and toys. Amethyst dragons are very learned creatures.


'
This Dragons favorite elements are: Amethyst, Deep Places, and Magic

Which Online Personality Test are You?

>

I'm The James Bond Villain Personality Test!

I live in a fictional world of spies and blonde women with ridiculous names, and I like to give people plenty of options. Although whether they're villainous is not optional.

Click here to find out which test you are!

The Comprehensive DDR Personality Test

Come take the Comprehensive DDR Personality Test!

Created by ptocheia

What Mythical Beast Best Represents You?

You are the most universal mythical beast ever. Sightings of the unicorn have been reported from all over the world, even in modern times. Unicorns are pure and incorruptible. In China, unicorns symbolized gentleness, good will, and wisdom. Christianity links the unicorn with Christ. It is said that unicorns would only allow virgin girls to see them, let alone touch them. They were easily lured into fatal ambushes by a virgin with some poachers waiting for the unicorn in nearby bushes. A unicorn's horn was a highly prized possession, which was reputed to have great healing capabilities. With the touch of its horn, a unicorn could bring back a person who had been dead for several hours. But when separated from the unicorn's body, the magic was significantly reduced. The unicorn had the body of a horse, a unique spiraling horn, and a lion's tail. They were pure white in color.

What mythical beast best represents you? Take the quiz!

What High School Stereotype are You?

Take the What High School
Stereotype Are You? quiz.

RufusSafer's Final Fantasy 8 Quiz

Which Final Fantasy 8 Character are you?
You don't like being around people but they don't let that stop them. For some reason others see you as a good leader and keep putting you in charge when you would be much happier locked in your room away from the world.

Personality Disorder Test

Disorder	Rating
Paranoid:	Moderate
Schizoid:	Moderate
Schizotypal:	High
Antisocial:	Moderate
Borderline:	Low
Histrionic:	Low
Narcissistic:	Moderate
Avoidant:	High
Dependent:	High
Obsessive-Compulsive:	Moderate
-- Personality Disorder Test - Take It! --

Advanced Big 45 Personality Test

Advanced Big 45 Personality Test Results Gregariousness 42% Sociability 38% Assertiveness 58% Poise 66% Leadership 50% Provocativeness 62% Self-Disclosure 78% Talkativeness 62% Group Attachment 50% Extroversion 56% Understanding 70% Warmth 38% Morality 50% Pleasantness 42% Empathy 46% Cooperation 42% Sympathy 54% Tenderness 54% Nurturance 50% Friendliness 49% Conscientiousness 50% Efficiency 54% Dutifulness 50% Purposefulness 50% Organization 70% Cautiousness 34% Rationality 38% Perfectionism 46% Orderliness 42% Orderliness 48% Stability 70% Happiness 54% Calmness 62% Moderation 42% Toughness 78% Impulse Control 54% Imperturbability 14% Cool-headedness 50% Tranquility 22% Emotional Stability 51% Intellect 66% Ingenuity 66% Reflection 50% Competence 74% Quickness 78% Introspection 70% Creativity 70% Imagination 62% Depth 54% Openmindedness 65%

Take Free Advanced Big 45 Personality Test
personality tests by similarminds.com

Discover Your Inner Candy Heart

discover your inner candy heart @ quiz me

What Pie Flavor are You?

find your inner PIE @ stvlive.com

What Poetry Form am I?

Short, terse, unfriendly, Yet sometimes quite emotive; I am the Haiku. What Poetry Form Are You?

What pre-1985 Video Game Character am I?

I am a Space-invader.



I will happily recruit the help of friends to aid me in getting what I want. I have no tolerance for people getting in my way, and I am completely relentless until any threats or opposition are removed. I try to be down-to-earth, but something always seems to get in the way. What Video Game Character Are You?

What's your Sexual Personality?

According to relationship expert and Relate counsellor Denise Knowles, you're sexually uninhibited and ready to try almost anything once. You take the lead in bed and aren't afraid to ask for what you want. Sex for you is an essential part of life and you enjoy exploring its many aspects. You have a high sex drive and thrive in a relationship in which your partner enjoys sexual activity as much as you do. However, just be careful not to let other aspects of your relationship suffer due to your pre-occupation with sex. A strong relationship works best when built on trust, friendship, love and respect also. Sex is a very important part of a relationship but the best partnerships work when all the ingredients are right.

Which of the Nine Muses is your Greatest Inspiration?

Do you live and breathe poetry? If so, Calliope, patron goddess of epic poetry, may well be your muse. She is often depicted holding a writing tablet and wearing a golden crown, for she is the oldest of the muses and their leader. Her name means "The Fair Voiced," but Calliope inspires eloquence in writing. The next time you feel compelled to write (especially something "big"), call upon Calliope for inspiration and perhaps you'll pen your greatest work yet.

Learn more about Calliope.

Which OS are You?

Which OS are You?

Which Nigerian Spammer are You?

Which Nigerian spammer are You?